Show transcript – December 2020 – reclaiming you

Unedited Transcript Podcast with De’nicea Hilton July 2020 Play

reclaiming. It’s a noun, the process of claiming something back or reasserting a right. Welcome to this week’s episode of granting journey reclaiming you. I’m excited to have my guests know Billy Wilder here to discuss the word reclaiming the word that just it sounds so empowering. Because reclaiming, we find our power back. And so when I asked Emily why she wanted to talk about reclaiming, she said, I find that reclaiming our power, boundaries, joy and pleasure is how we stopped holding ourselves back from happiness and fulfillment. And that was just like, yes, that’s a conversation I want to have. So neighborly, welcome. I’m excited. You’re

Thank you. Thank you so much. I love like, I love just hearing what I said back and being like, Yes, I very much still believe that. Yes, I’m very much agree with that. Yeah, I love the word, reclamation, reclaiming things. It’s part of my work, but also in general, I love seeing it in the world. Like, I think we all cry over different things, right? Like some people cry over. You know, commercials, some people cry replays, or like TV shows. And sometimes I really, I get very emotional when I see people or minorities or cultures like getting to reclaim things, their traditions, their language, their land, their dignity, like that’s like dignity, like people having dignity is something I can cry about, like. Yeah, and that for some reason that really touches something in me.

I love that because it does, and especially in today’s climate. And so one of the things I didn’t give the formal introduction of you because I was just so excited to get started. But Natalie is a Danish actress and artists turned professional numerologist and writer and she’s living in LA. So if you know me, and you followed me, you know, I have this love for Scandinavia, because I used to live in Sweden. I used to go to Copenhagen on a regular thing. And that’s where you’re fun. Correct. Copenhagen,

So let’s just dive right into reclaiming. I know one of the quotes that I read to you pre Han pre recording that I was excited about is you Reclaim Your power by loving what you once were told to hate. And that’s by Brian H. McGill. And I love that because to me, that’s kind of the conversation today is reclaiming our power, reclaiming ourselves, because we’ve lost so much of that. And in our bonus episode, we’re going to talk about self esteem prophecy. And I’ve got a couple quotes for that, that totally match reclaiming. So let’s just jump in, like, where How did you find your way here, and to continue being such a bad hostess today?

So part of what you do is you work with the numbers in your birthday, the vibration behind your name to show you the challenges, gifts and lessons, you’re here to master and share with the world. So that’s a whole lot of reclaiming. So tell me, how did you end up there?

Yeah, so I, oh, my God, such a long journey. And then again, when I think about it very short, because I’m not that old. I’m in my 30s. I don’t, I don’t consider that that old. So back in 2013 14, I had a friend. And she’s the kind of friend that we followed along on each other’s journey. And like, we’ve introduced each other to whatever new thing we were interested in, whether it was like, let’s try to cut out gluten or like I love this book, or have you heard about this acting school or like this kind of organic hair color and brand, you know, that kind of friend who like leads you on a journey, and we’ve done that for each other. And then she suddenly changed her name. And I was like, What just happened to your why and how, and then after that name, change, a lot of things started to click for her and change and release. And I think there was also some reclamation going on, for sure. And I was like, This is so interesting. I know nothing about numerology and name change. But I’m very much like go big or go home kind of person. So it’s like, Okay, well, you know what I was living in New York at the time. I was like, why not just try it. You know, if the person if the numerologist can’t say anything accurate, then, you know, it doesn’t work. But they could like a very mind blowing session, which you read the energies in my birthday, and in my current name at that time, and she was very spot on. She was like, well, we can we can change this, we can support you in a different way with a different kind of name. And I was like, well, let’s just try it. And if it doesn’t work, I can always change it back. It was a little teenage. Like a little like, yeah, I’ll just try it. Like, I’ll just jump both just try it.

That’s awesome. I changed. Yeah. Well, I think like, sometimes when you do it, you don’t consider it as a big thing. But then when you see other people do it, you’re like, Oh my god, that’s so huge. There’s lots of things that I would never do, or I’d be really scared to do. But moving to a different country changing my name, like certain things, I’m like, yeah, you know, it’s gonna be okay. I can always change my mind later. So a lot of things shifted in my life. On like, the physical plane in my actual life, things that people could see. But the internal shifts were like, the biggest definitely after my name change. And I was just like, fascinated. I’ve never been fascinated by anything, but acting, actually, in most of my life, acting and like the arts, creativity, mastery of like, different skills in that realm. And then I was just like, this is insane. This spiritual tool is insane. I need to know how and why and and what it were like, why it works, so I studied it. And I’m still studying it like you know, now I’m professional numerologist and I help people change their name when I do sessions and help people reclaim who they are and like, understand, like karmic connection. Some stuff like that. But I’m also still studying it because I feel like any field that’s worth the like real study and real, like real focus is something you can keep diving into, at least for me, I’m like, it never ends, if you’re really interested in never ends, you’ll never fully master it, you’ll always just like, go deeper with it. So that’s my journey with it. And one of the things that I do in my work is very much allowing people to see themselves, like, really, really being, I mean, it’s part of the birthday, I was born on my base numbers in numerology of being the cheerleader for others being the sun that shines on them and go, like, look how amazing you are. I mean, just look at you. And that’s part of the journey for people is like recognizing that a lot of the stuff that they have been shamed for, or called out for or felt different for or felt wrong for is actually some of their superpowers. Some of the things they’re really here to share.

I love that. And it like, when we talked about reclaiming, I was just really thinking kind of like, middle aged mom who’s emptiness, and she’s reclaiming herself that you’re bringing a whole nother level to it. And it’s neat, because the episode I recorded last week, was about family and family heritage and family. Not like now family, but three generations back what was happening with your grandmother, what was happening, and if so, it, this seems to fit right in line. And I’m like, Oh, this will be a great next step is to publish. But let’s talk about name for a second, because I know that I have seen that you said that. But we haven’t really dived into that. And like for my mother, it’s just funny, because in the family episode, there was a lot of conversation about my mother. And I’m afraid she’s gonna listen to all these episodes now. And so my mom was raised in a not pleasant home life, she did an amazing job to raise me. And I think I was maybe five or six. And she changed her name. But changing her name for her was part of being somebody different leaving the past in the past and becoming who she is. And so what I get from you, though, like, tell me a little bit more about the name change process? Is it you’re connecting to a past life, you’re connecting to something new? Like, how did you pick novalee.

Um, there are two things in this as a numerologist, I pick the vibration, okay, behind the name, and many names can have the same vibration, it’s behind every letter is a number. And then I add up the numbers to find the vibration behind that name. So when I look at people, I look at the numbers in their names and their numerous scope. And their numerous scope is kind of like a horoscope. But it’s created by the name, which means that when we change our name for any reason, we mess a little bit with our numerous scope. And usually when we do that, we intensify some of the energies going on there unless we are mindful, unless we work with a numerologist. Or like other people where we focus on releasing some of the unsupportive energies. So when I work with people, people come to me for all different kinds of reason there is as many, you know, everyone has a story about their name, why they were named that how they feel about it, how often they have to spell it, if they’re named after someone else, if they like it, like whatever, like there’s always a story. And there’s just as many reasons to change it. Like some people are just like, that’d be fun. I never really connected to my name. Some people like me, I was like, I hated my last name. My old last name, I always had to spell it. I didn’t like it. I didn’t like writing it. I’m also like, sometimes it’s a dead giveaway. Like if you don’t like your name, if you don’t like spelling it, if you don’t like saying it if you don’t like when other people say it, I’d say maybe look a little bit into numerology because maybe there’s some gifts there for you. Yeah, but I look at the vibrations behind I look at what birthday you have, what kind of person you are, what you’re here to do, and show us and you know, teach other people and enjoy in life. And then with the name vibrations and everything around it. I tried to support that, because it’s also like, yeah, people are wounded in their true self. If I like, if I said something mean and hurtful about you, that was obviously not true. And something you were you’d be like, well, that’s not true. So I mean, I don’t really care. But if I knew you really well, and I said something hurtful, hurtful about who you truly are, then that might create a trauma over time and that’s kind of what we’re doing. Trying to clear and support you and just being that true self and like I mean, reclaiming the weirdness, reclaiming the sensitivity, reclaiming the boss energy, whatever is in there. I mean, for lots of women, numerology doesn’t really discriminate in terms of gender. So there’s just as many leaders born in a female forum, as there are in a male form, but we treat females who want to be leaders different in our culture. And sometimes they need a lot more support, to reclaim their bossiness, reclaim their directness, reclaim their no bullshit, attitude. And I’m like, well, you need to have it because we need to see you lead. And you can’t care so much what other people think. You just can’t. If you want to lead us, then you can’t turn around and go like, Is this okay? You okay, with this direction? Are you okay? No, we need you to say, I’m going this way. You better come with me. Yeah,

I love that. You know, and especially cuz now this won’t air till like early December. But we’re recording on election day. Yeah. So you know, it’s very relevant. And you know, one of the things that my dad always taught me before I was able to vote is that if you don’t know the office, and it’s a man against a woman, vote for the woman because she needs your support. And not that I’m saying you should vote that way, all elections, but it was just in that whole leadership of female and what we are reclaiming as a generation as a society as a culture right now. So reclaiming goes so much deeper than just reclaiming oneself. But reclaiming, if we all kind of band together and reclaim ourselves, I believe that we’re able to reclaim ourselves as a generation, because you create that shift in the energy for everybody. Yeah. And

we also just stopped pretending some food, that we’re something we’re not, and it gets a lot easier to go like, Yes, I like who you are, and what you stand for going with that, and then not having to, yeah, pretend or play a role or mask ourselves, which is also like a ramp and thing. Sometimes I feel like for certain fields, and like, just be an actor, you’re definitely acting in your role already. But it’s not needed. And in the end, people are going to feel deceived. Because if we do,

let’s talk about that for a second. Because I’m 45 Well, I’ll be 45. This year, next birthday, at my son’s 20. He is shifting into an adult, I’m shifting into emptiness. And one of the things that I was working with my coach, and I think that a lot of listeners, because when you first say stop playing a role, like I, I loved being a mom, like I love being a mom, I love being a devoted wife, I loved all those things. Those were also a part of a role that I was playing and now I’m playing me. And you know, maybe playing that role was being me, but I just I want to kind of touch on that. Because I know when my coach for said that, to me, I like it triggered me all sorts of stuff about like, What do you mean, I’ve been playing a role, like, I really loved that part of my life.

Yeah, yeah, not change it.

So but now that I’m stepping into, like, giving my son space to be him, and I get to reclaim me as me, I’m not a mom, I’m not just a loving wife, I’m me. That’s where I feel like many of our listeners will be in reclaiming themselves is, that was a great part of my life. I’m evolving out of that. So it’s not necessarily that I did play a role. It’s just that that was a part of my life. And now coming into the steps of this.

Yeah, I’m definitely not talking about playing a role in in terms of going from one face of life to the next face of life. I am more saying that. This one of the things that I see in my work is that sometimes people who feel this energy early on are often drawn to the arts. Because putting on something or channeling something, or playing a role, or trying on a style or trying on a costume or whatever, is what the arts are for, like it is a creative outlet. Sometimes when I see these people and they have the same energies, it might be in their names. It might be somewhere else in their numerous scope, and I see them in public office or on TV. And people are like, Oh, I don’t there’s something about this person I don’t like and I’m like, Yeah, the thing you don’t like is that they are using something that should be on stage. In something that should be more neutral, like public office or whatever, and resolutely, on stage, we love that like magic. But offstage often, it triggers us and we go like there’s something About this person I don’t like I can’t really read them. I feel like they’re either wishy washy or opportunistic, or, yeah, we just react a little different. I think they like animal and us react to when we don’t know what’s going on. And we, when we don’t know what’s going on, we just perceive the person as a threat. And it’s hard to hear what they say, or see what they do. And we might default to like, yeah, gender stereotypes or other things like that.

Absolutely, there’s definitely times because, you know, there are people that I can think of that I’m like, Oh, they were just, you know, playing that role at work or playing. Because when I was in sales, I definitely played a role in sales at my job, because that’s how I made money. So there are definitely times to that we play that, or, as you mentioned, public, public officials, you know, there’s, you just know that you feel an authenticity.

And they’re also taught that, like, I mean, it’s also sometimes when we’re like, I just want people to be authentic. And I’m like, well, we have not always created a society where you win by being authentic, or I mean, also, like, I mean, right now, we don’t have to talk about that. But like, canceled culture, people do something wrong or did something wrong. 10 years ago, they profiles, like really apologized for it. And we’re like, you’re still canceled? And I’m like, No, we also have to allow people to make mistakes and make amends. Absolutely. Yeah. Just cancel everyone.

Well, and that’s part of, you know, to move it back to reclaiming. And being authentic, to be authentic, because that’s definitely a word that just stars and stuff inside of me. being authentic is allowing the grace for yourself, and allowing the grace for others. And that’s vital in reclaiming your power. Because when we say at least for me, when I say reclaiming my power, it doesn’t mean that I have to go make a big stand or make a big scene, if anything. For me, reclaiming my power is being able to say to my husband, I don’t want to cook dinner anymore, because I hate it. And it’s something I had to do. Like, I want you to cook dinner. I’ll do laundry like to me Yeah, we can even your power can be that little.

Yeah. And also just the joy of it, reclaiming your joy. I like I had that with my husband where I was like, Okay, now I need a schedule before I was fine. Just like sometimes making dinner and sometimes you make dinner. But you know what, I’d really like to look at a schedule for a while and be like, it’s not my time to make dinner today. Yeah. And plan around that or like with other things it’s like, I mean, because as a woman, we can’t like the emotional labor of planning and running a house, even a small house, even with few people, even whatever we are, no matter where we live in the world brought up to take the lion’s share, and do that part. So if we don’t delegate, if we don’t, if we don’t authentically go, like you know what, I love doing laundry, and I hate doing the dishes. And you know, what, if Bring me a lot of joy, if you always did the dishes, and I always did the laundry, you know, like, it’s such a minor thing, but sometimes it’s just like, authentically See, saying, like, I hate this part. Can you do this part, please? Or is there any way we can get someone else to do this part? You know, like, I am planning for that when my business gets even bigger. I’m like, I am hiring your cleaner. Mm hmm. Cuz that is not my zone of genius, or most joy. Okay, tidy.

I love when a conversation

because like, to me, this is just confirmation right now. Because so far, you brought up joy, which was a podcast two podcasts ago. And joy is a big word for me. So reclaiming ourselves so that you can find the joy because there’s definitely been a time for me

I was going through the motions, I was going through the actions, I was doing what I was supposed to be doing. And I was providing for my family and everybody was happy, but we weren’t joyous about it. You know, so talking about reclaiming your joy.

I love that. Yeah. And also, I mean, I feel like generally, like sometimes we are in such a stuck place that we need, like a major shift to change. Other times, we just need all the tiny little upgrades of being like, Can I get this off my plate? Can you do this so I can do things that make me happy. Or like I mean, really saying, I feel so loved when you bring home flowers, or I feel so loved when you give me a compliment the day and like, whatever it is like being very direct and like these are the things I need off my plate. They’re minor, and these are the things I want on my plate and they’re actually still minor and then like the quality of life And our joy and our feeling of being appreciated and loved and cared for, you know, love languages. They’re just so helpful

when I think part of that is reclaiming our voice, because so long we I know for me Throat Chakra work has been the last couple of months and I am recovering from a cold right now. So I sound a little raspy on this recording. I don’t know if it sounds like Phoebe from friends sexy,

raspy, or just like fingernails scratching on the word in between. Yeah,

I’ve got my cup of tea to kind of keep it soon. But you know, so often, at least in my experience growing up, it was kind of the like, I was the younger kid, my brother was a lot of trouble. So I stayed quiet, because nobody told me I had to stay quiet. But

I told myself,

if I just kind of stay under the radar, it’s easier for mom and dad. I don’t want to create a rustle, you know. And so, for me speaking up, even to my husband to say, I don’t want to cook dinner anymore. Like, it was uncomfortable. Because that previous thinking that again, I told myself was well just it’s easier if you just don’t say it, like just do what you need to and make it easier. So reclaiming my voice, by being able to say to him, I want to do dinner, like, I don’t want to sweep the house because it bothers my allergies, and I want to do dinner and those are your job, you know. So we find that trying to read, there’s so many things to reclaim to become ourselves again.

Yeah. And also we find often in reclamation, if we are around good people that they are so happy to help us. They’re like, Oh, this would make you happy. This would make you feel loved. Okay, well, let me do that for you. I mean, sometimes when people are like I went, when women complain about their husbands, when husbands complain about their wives, when people in general just complain about their partner, sometimes I think, have you said what you just said to me, to them, have you said, I really hate this thing. I wish this, this is my solution, or like, this is what I wish could happen. And then had the conversation about like, how can we make this happen? Because I mean, I’ve had that, like, we all have like little weird things. Like my husband does piles. Tyler, he likes piles, that’s totally okay. I just, you know, I have a maximum of piling I can take, when we reach, you know, three or four piles in the same room, I start getting annoyed, and I don’t want to touch them. I don’t want to be anyone’s mom. Um, so I’ve just told him. And then he removed the piles. And it’s fine. You know, instead of me going around being like, slowly imploding inside with resentment. And, you know, slamming the cabinet doors in the kitchen and like thinking that people could just read my mind. And so just being like, I can’t deal with the piles. You got to deal with the piles, or you got it. They got to be confined to some room or some desk or whatever. And I don’t want to be in charge of it. Yeah. Well, and one

of the things that I keep thinking about is, if you don’t know how to reclaim your voice, and you don’t always know what starts. Yeah. And you know, one of the things I did this in my very first episode, we talked about balance. And the guest who was on was a really good friend of mine. She’d never heard of a hell yes. And hell no list. And so I was like, Oh, my gosh, you have to create your hell yes. And your hell no list, because that’s the one thing for me, that helps me finally, it’s like you said, Have you said what you’re saying to me to somebody to the person you feel it about? Like, if you don’t know, creating that how No, and how the S list helps you know, what matters? What doesn’t matter? And you know, raisina now 20 year old son, there are a lot of pick your battles, like did it matter that he was doing this so that later when I said something about that he heard me? And that’s one of the things I think what the hell yes, hell no list is, you pick your battles, you pick what really makes you crazy that you got to talk about and you pick the stuff that you’re like, like flowers, that’s something special, you know, and so so we’ll post a link to one in our blogs that have one already made, but it’s one of those things that helping you reclaim is knowing your hell now and your hell yes list because if you don’t know, you can’t reclaim anything if you’re just frustrated all the time.

Yeah. And also like reclaiming your voice, like, Listen to yourself complaining, especially if you are a little oblivious. I know that for myself, especially like a couple of years ago, I would have people that I would only call when I was kind of in a bad mood. And all we would do was like bitch about stuff. And you know, I would keep going We words really do have power. If we complain about someone or something, day in, day out months it like year in, year out, and we don’t pay attention to the fact that we could just go tell the person or deal with the problem and take that complaint off our list. I mean, we have a saying in Scandinavia, there’s there’s no bad weather. There’s just the wrong clothes. I love that. And if it’s, I mean, because one of the things that people always complain about in Scandinavia, because it’s like very Northern Europe, lots of great days, lots of rain, but lots of like, not even real snow. Yeah, no. So people complain about the weather all the time. But in reality, you know, you can just put on some different clothes, and it’s okay. And that’s the thing with complaining and I mean, like your hell yes, or hell no list like, it’s no surprise, your life turns out a certain way. And you keep certain problems in your life, if you keep them there by talking about them like they are unsolvable, or unmovable. Or also talking about like, the people in your life talk about them. Like they can’t change. Of course they can. You know, if they want to? Or like, of course, they want to help you, if you ask them. I think very few people are on the level of narcissism when they don’t give a damn about someone else. Like, most people I’ve talked to where I’ve had a problem. They’ve been like, Oh, I’m so happy. You told me. I’m gonna change that. Or I’m gonna make that better. Or can we buy a robotic vacuum cleaner? I also hate vacuuming. But that’s

funny, because that’s the thing my husband and I this week, I was like, I’m totally getting one of those for Christmas. Like, that’s fine. He and I he’s not gonna present I’m not gonna present that’s what we’re

like Friday sales, like, just get it? Yeah. Yeah, miracle.

I love it. There’s so many connections of like, relatability. And the conversation of things that you don’t even think because as I said, When I came to this call, I was like, oh, we’re gonna talk about reclaiming our power and ourselves as women and blah, blah, and, and just having it go to those little things of reclaiming doesn’t have to be a big deal. It doesn’t have to be this like, month sabbatical without anything or anybody. It just has to be finding that joy, reclaiming yourself, reclaiming the things you like, and you don’t like.

Yeah, and it’s also I mean, I often tell people, we can always point to times in our life, where things were shit. But we can also point to times in our life where things weren’t good. And sometimes if we want to feel better, the thing to do instead of thinking we have to reinvent the wheel is go back, like, wait, when I feel good, what is it that I do? automatically? Is there any of those things, or thought patterns or emotions or requests that I could make right now, for example, I know, I mean, I moved to LA, because I’m almost, I’m happiest in the summer. And when I lived in Denmark, the summer is three months, if that

I was gonna say really

long. Call it the summer, right. And there was only, you know, one month that’s truly warm, still with rain. And I was like, I wonder who I would be if I lived in a place where there was summer, almost all year around. I wonder who I would be in that spot. And I’m not saying everyone can just move to California. But that was one of the things was like, I’d like to try this out and see how much that’s gonna change my life. There also other things I do, for example, when I’m in love, or when I’m happy, or I feel confident in my body, and instead of going like, Oh, I can’t do that now. Because I’m feeling down and be like, well, what would happen if I did that now? What would happen if I acted like I was involved? What would happen? I mean, it also helps your relationships, but like, what would happen if I showed myself the kind of grace that I show myself when I’m in love, or if I treat myself in the way that I did when I was, you know, 20 pounds lighter, or whatever it is where it’s like, you can just nothing is reserved for later. You can do it right now, most of the time, you can do it right now. I get it. It’s not certain things are just like out of your hands. But you can usually say to someone like I need five minutes of meditation, you have to take the baby or the dog or whatever like or I need. I need an afternoon a week, just one afternoon a week and then I’m going to plan that like,They’re usually ways of reclaiming your time and your joy and some of the behaviors that make you happy. I mean, when I moved to the US, the first thing I missed was biking. So I had to get a bike in New York. And I think people thought I was like crazy for biking around in New York and across the Brooklyn Bridge, and from the lorry side to Midtown to go to school. And we were like, why don’t you just use the subway and I’m like, the joy of driving, you know, by the water, or biking by the water all the way up to 37th Street. I was like, this is this is priceless to me. Not going to do it again. Because it was from the summer in New York, and the heat was insane. And I would meet another shot at work when I arrived to my destination, but but it gave me such joy to be able to bike. And I was like, Okay, well, then that’s what I need to do. And I get to do it every day. And that’s really joyful to me.

Yeah, and that’s so much. There’s so much in reclaiming our joy. And knowing what joy is for us. Because like I said, I was happy, but I didn’t feel joy. Like, in my happiness. I was kind of like, this is good. But why does it not feel,

joyous. And so finding those little things. Now, one of my big treats for myself is on Fridays, we knock off early, and have a friend that has 140 acres, and we take our dogs down and we go for an hour, and just let them run her property. And that brings me joy, because my love My dogs so much that, you know, it’s just finding those little things and knowing that, okay, it’s Friday, I’ve got something I’m like, this is for me, this is my time, but it brings me so much joy, watching our big doggy dog just run.

You know, so, so lovely. And it also, by the way, sounds very affordable. Like sometimes I also think we think, Oh, I’m gonna get a lot happier if I get X amount of more money or freedom or whatever I’m like, Yeah, sure. But a lot of upgrades are free.

That’s a great point. I love that you brought that up, because it started all sorts of things. In my mind. I’ve been doing a lot of chakra work. And I’ve kind of talked about that through the calls that I have had recently. And I was just working on the sacral. And one of those things that I was reading about is that we so often say, Well, when I have that job, when I have the bigger house, when I’m married, like we put all these contingencies on when we’re going to be happy and when we’re going to be joyous, but it’s not. Because once you find that relationship, once you find that job, once you find that home, it didn’t fix what you were feeling the lack of it just gave you kind of a pacification, like capacity for you. It’s about that really reclaiming and knowing. It’s not that it’s the new house that I want, it’s the more space so that I can have my own space, and I can have my own time. So creating that space in that time where you are,

or you want to manifest things, the first thing you want to do is get the emotion that you’re looking to have in the end already. Like, if it’s like, oh, I’m only going to find peace when I moved to Tibet. That’s really far off. Sometimes if you can’t find any peace in your current day to day life, or like, Oh, I’m gonna treat myself and I’m gonna, I’m going to start eating better wins like this, or that happens. And it’s like, No, you can put down the candy right now. And I’m not saying that the candy is not hard to put down. But like you could you could treat yourself. Like I think that black and white thinking all in all out is just the biggest trip. For people. Like the I love a good makeover story in a movie, I love a good montage of like how they train themselves to join a dance competition or whatever. But I’m like, in reality, life is not just black and white. It’s not like you either got it, or you don’t have it at all. Like it’s, it’s the journey to there. And, and I mean, also, as soon as you arrive somewhere, we often just come up with a new goal.

Absolutely. That’s why I say you know, getting that big house isn’t going to fix it because then you’re gonna be like, Oh,

well, I need to do maintenance or maintenance for that house. You know?

Yeah, it’s, it is a journey. And that’s why you know, this podcast is called grounding journey. Because the adventure is in the journey, not the arrival. It’s all about the experience and how we look at that experience and how we really kind of feel about that experience.

I agree.

I love that we’re just like Yeah,

Yeah, exactly what you said, well, so we’ve talked a lot about reclaiming. We’ve talked a lot about kind of finding that joy finding it within ourselves. One of the things that really interested me was about your numerology. So let’s talk about how you sometimes when you’re working with clients, or yourself or any AP, you know, method of that, how do you use numerology to help people claim because I think numerology is something people don’t understand.

Yeah, so I think the basis kind of like astrology can be helpful, if that resonates with you is understanding your type. I mean, numerology is the original personality type assessment, because it’s based on the birthday, so you got nine numbers, because every birthday, you know, you can be born on a one, day two, day three, day four, day five, day six, a a seven day, an eight day or a nine day, because every day, you know, the 30th is a three day or the 31st is a four day or the 27 is a nine day all days can be reduced to one number. So you are one out of nine numbers. And then of course, we look at your zodiac sign, we look at what year you were born, and we can do all of that extra layer. But what I do is, first and foremost, look at that first number in someone’s birthday. And that tells me what they’re here to do, what their challenges and gifts are, and also usually where they’re hurt. Because like I think I mentioned earlier, like we are only wounded on our true selves. Like we can’t. If you can’t, if you call a person, bossy, who is not bossy, and who does not have that in their numbers, and they’re not interested in that they’re not going to be hurt by it at all, they’re gonna be like, That’s not true. Okay, I’m just moving on. Um, but I mean, it’s made me a lot more empathetic, kind to a lot of people. Because people are not like me, they are not like me, I have very few friends who are like me or have the same base number as me, except for my dad, he is a I’m a one, he’s a double one. So that’s why we sometimes butt heads. I’m like, you’re doing it wrong. And he’s like you’re doing it wrong. Like, we often get triggered by our own energy, because that’s, of course, where we have our shadows of traumas or our jealousy about like, Oh, I want to do that. That’s like my mission too. But I can’t do it like you’re like, you know, we get triggered by that. So what I do is like, I look at that I try to remind people of who they are, and they feel seen and that, and then we usually talk about what it feels like to be on the low end of that spectrum. So we can kind of track ourselves and like, okay, these are the thoughts that come up. This is the solution to those thoughts. Like this is the kind of behavior I veer into, when I’m really under pressure, what can I do to change that. And we don’t have the time in this podcast to like go through every single base number. But that’s basically what I do. Because I feel like some people are interested in the name change, some people are interested in going deeper, but everyone is interested in knowing themselves better. And feeling understood by the world and also usually knowing other people better. I mean, I feel sometimes when I see, I mean, we’re not gonna talk about the election. But like, when I see who’s in charge, I’m like, but of course you are. And for other people, I’m like, this is not what you should be doing. I know, it’s what you’re doing. But it’s not what you should be doing. This is not where you will truly Excel and feel seen and feel joyful and find your calling. Often when people are like, Oh, you just described this base number, but I know this person and they’re not like that. And then I’m like, are they happy? Do they look happy doing whatever it is that they’re doing? Are they do they look like it’s hard, because sometimes that’s also a dead giveaway. Like if we are a certain kind of person. It’s not that there’s only one job for us. Everyone can be a leader. You know, everyone can be a follower. But for some people, they really need leadership, they really need to use those skills and for other people, like they really need pleasure. It’s really like one of the things they’re here to teach us about. So there needs to be space in their life for that. For the pause and the break and the joy and the playfulness.

And love that that

just has me like reflecting so much that I’m like, Oh,

I got to talk again.

I love when I’m have guest on it happened in one of my other recent episodes. I was writing so much that she stopped and I’m like, oh, oh, when I say so I really love when I’m just so like in lost and what you’re saying then I’m like, yeah, that’s so powerful to think about. When people aren’t in their right place, and when they’re not following what they need to be, and it’s hard, it’s really hard to be open and aware enough to know when you’re in that place because we and that’s one of the things and telecine prophecy that I was going to read, which I’ll go on and throw it in here now. Um, okay, so it says, working to establish a more comfortable style of survival has grown to feel complete in and of itself as a reason to live. And we’ve gradually methodically forgotten our own original question. We forgotten that we still don’t know what we’re surviving for. And then it goes on to say, do you feel as if you have a clearer perspective of on the human world? Do you have Do you see how preoccupied everyone’s been the perspective explains a lot? How many people do you know who are obsessed with their work? Who are type A, or who have stress related diseases, and you can’t slow down, they can’t, can’t slow down because they use the routine to distract themselves to reduce life to its only practical considerations. And they do this to avoid recalling how uncertain they are about why they live. Like that’s exactly what you’re saying is, we get so distracted, we forget who we are, we forget what makes our passion, what brings us happiness. And that’s what’s our job in this life is to reclaim that space.

And we also get very scared that there’s only one way of doing it. Like sometimes once in a while, these clients never follow up, because I don’t think I give them the answer they want. When people are like, I need that one job, tell me what what that one job or that one cut like way or will I get success. And I’m like, Well, I can tell you what you’re good at. I can tell you what we want from you. But I can also tell you, you can do that, and be that and share that from many jobs and many careers. And you can change throughout time and lots of the parameters of like, of course, you need to make money, of course, it needs to be sustainable. Like, there are lots of like buts and ifs. But it’s such a lie that there’s only one way especially today, like sometimes when people are like, Oh, so the thing I see in my work. When people are like, ooh, change her name, that’s like a lot. Um, like, you change your hair, you change your partner, you move across the world, you know, you change careers, like nothing is I mean, change is so it’s everywhere. And it’s just going faster and faster and faster. And that’s not necessarily a bad thing. It’s okay to have multiple careers, it’s okay to have multiple partners, it’s okay to have like a mixed family, it’s okay to move. And then decide, no, you want to move back again. Like it’s okay to change your mind all the time. And it’s also okay to change your name. Like it’s also okay to be like, whether you are reclaiming, maybe heritage, maybe you’re reclaiming energy, maybe you’re reclaiming something or you are like, I mean, I see that also with people who are born the wrong gender, like born in the wrong body, where it’s like, this is who I am. And now the gender is, luckily, a little more fluid in our, in our consciousness, and we understand that there are people who are born with a different kind of expression, then they might also want names that are a little more unisex, like that just doesn’t feel so limiting. Like, I don’t know that we’re veering into different territory here. But like in in Denmark, girls need to be named girl names, and boys need to name boy names. And in the US, I love that there is actually not a limit. You know, there’s not limit to what you can call your child or name yourself. You know, if you’re a woman, and you want to be called James, go for it. Like why are we even like, categorizing things in that way? If we literally it’s

all about evolution, and, and flowing, being in the flow with life and the changes that it brings, because we’re not stagnant. We don’t just sit still through our whole lives, and you have to have that fluidity to experience all that’s brought your way and to be open to all that the universe has to offer you.

Well, it’s been so nice to talk to you and our time, we’re gonna wrap it up. I’m excited that we’re going to have our bonus episode to you. So I know that our we our listeners are going to be interested in connecting with you. So you’ve got a podcast and your podcast name is

the numerology podcast. That sounds super awesome. So

if you’re a podcaster anyway, you’re going to want to check out the numerology podcaster will also on granting journey podcast.com will list all the links to you so people can find your website? where’s the best place? Where do you hang out? Nice Instagram?

Instagram, um, no Billy Wilder everywhere, also on Twitter or whatever, but I am mostly on Instagram. And like, I mean, my website is also just no Novalee Wilder calm. I’m lucky to be I did not plan on this. But like, it seems like no one else has this name. So I’m easy to find them that way.Well, thank

you so much for your time. Thank you for being here to discuss reclaiming information. It’s been really great. And I’m sure that our listeners will have gotten something from it. So thank you for being here.

Thank you. This was a true pleasure. We covered a lot.

Yeah, we did. It was kind of all over the place. But that’s what I love about these conversations is I have all these questions, and I rarely ever get to ask them, because the conversation just evolved so much. So we’ll release this and then the following week, we’ll release our bonus episode about self esteem prophecy, which is one of the books I have been just itching to talk about. So if you have or haven’t read celsion prophecy, you want to make sure to tune in next week and hear that that’s a classic and thank you so much.

Thank you.

BONUS EPISODE

Welcome to today’s bonus episode of grounding journey with Natalie Wilder. We’re gonna talk about the self esteem prophecy. I’m so excited. This was one of the books that was on my list of like somebody please some of you’ve read this. And my last bonus episode we talked about the alchemist which is another book that I just those were my top two that I wanted to talk about. And both were books that I actually got my husband to read. So I know that normally when you and I talked to kind of pre hand we were like, yeah, let’s talk about that one. So let’s talk about it.

I’m sorry, with the podcasting world, you can’t see my face and how excited I am over those because I didn’t

hear I can hear it. Yeah, I can hear your voice.

So so this is a book by James Redfield. It’s the 20th 20th anniversary edition is what I have. And I know there’s quite a few after it. And I’ve got, like three more of his books that follow this, but I haven’t read them because it’s one of those that I’m like,

I think I started on the second one. And then I was like, not right now.

Yeah.

I don’t know. I think it’s one of the things where I mean, one of the books that you can reread it once every year, every other year and get new insights, or like some of the stuff that the first time I read it, like, maybe I didn’t skim it, but I was like, okay, you know, it was like, Okay, and then later as I’ve gotten deeper into my own spiritual awakening, or even like, engaging with other people and being like, Oh, this is a real trouble area for you. It’s less of a trouble area. For me interesting. Because it’s described in the book, I think, also, like different parts will resonate with different people.

It absolutely edits an easy read, like some books very easy. Very, yeah, some books are so great that like, I read a chapter, and then I have to take a nap and like, let my conscious catch my subconscious. But this one was an easy read. And I like you said, people pick up different things. I know that my husband got different things out of it than I did. And he actually had read it before we were together. And his dad is he gave it to me for my birthday one year. And then I read it. I’m like, Oh my gosh, this is like the best book. And he’s like, why read that? It was okay. And I’m like, you read the fiction in it. Like I read the depth to it. Yeah. So and I know that in our episode, where we talked about reclaiming our full length episode, we actually, I read a little quote out of it. But I have all sorts of pages paper clips about where I want to

new quote, new quote, What’s the next one?

Yeah, hit certain spots. So one of the things that I know when we talked about pre canned, there was another section you wanted which actually that section I have highlighted to say one of the first things that I loved about it, and I’m a Reiki practitioner, I love crystals, crystal healing. And in the book, it talks about the gentleman who is traveling through the story. He’s in the forest and Peru. And they’re kind of changing his diet. He’s eating plant based and really talking about seeing the energy of the plants and the energy of Mother Earth. And I’m like, I like to think of myself as active in Mother Earth. I love to go hiking, I love to take my dogs for walks in the woods. My rooms, all the rooms in my house are covered in flowers. I have a huge garden. And so this year, I really started doing lunar gardening. So I was doing everything by the moons and the moon cycles based on the plants. And I have, like 15 orchids, I love orchids. And so all of them needed to be repotted. So I did that along with the moon this year. And I’ve only repotted half of them, because orchid pots are expensive. We’ll just say it that way, when you got 15 of them. It’s a lot. So I’m kind of doing it with each cycle. And one of the things that I was noticing is I have shelves that each window and each one has three on it. And I did all three on one of the shelves and I was sitting in my Zen den doing meditation, and I came out of my meditation. And it was just in that right space that I happen to look at that shelf and watch and the energy just kind of like not vibrating, pulsating, but I don’t know, flowing out of this plants because they had new pots and new soil. They had been done within there and and they loved it. And that moment, I was like, Oh, that’s what they’re talking about. celsion prophecy is really feeling that emanating from the plants. And I loved that.

Yeah, I think it’s also like I remember reading it, there was a point where he’s sitting and staring at a plant, I think. And I remember thinking, I think I I think we all pick up on the energy of the world and let people around us in different ways. And I think we learn to shut down. And I think we learn to ignore I think we tell kids like no, that’s not happening even though it’s happening or like no, we’re not fighting even though we’re fighting or know nothing is going on with grandma even though something is going on with grandma. And I know many healers have experiences early in life where they try to energetically support Someone in their family, maybe they saw light, maybe they sent love, maybe they picked up on pain. And I feel like it’s just like, when he talks about plants, I was like, Yeah, but I feel like that with many people where I realized also as an actor, when you’re super present, you’re getting a lot of information from your surroundings and the people in the room, and it can be overwhelming, especially if someone in the room is denying that reality. So, most of the time, it’s, it’s more annoying, it’s more safe, to not be super present. And sometimes when we meditate, we get so super present that we can’t like, you know, you come out and you see the, you see the orchids like, you know, flowing, the energy flowing. Like, when he talked about the plants, I was like, this is just a metaphor for everything. Like everything can flow, everything can be cared for people to

learn, I think that’s part of his book is that it’s like, it’s an easy read, because I know I have kind of a little book club with two other friends and one of my friends is definitely my spirit soul sister, because we get really deep. And then another friend is she’s just kind of learning the spirit world. And she wants to know more. So it’s a neat dynamic when we do our book club. And this was a great book for all of us. Because for Julia and I, it was really a reminder, confirmation kind of opened up a few other avenues that we probably knew but forgot about, then for our friend, it was a really great book, because it was a way to kind of understand that awareness. And it made it I use the word simple in the sense that it wasn’t complex, like some books are complex for even me, and I’ve been studying spirituality for 20 years. But this was an easy read, for anybody to really kind of get in touch with that being aware and understanding more.

Yeah, and even though like he goes over the same things more than once, it’s still like the story moves along. So you can just like, oh, if you didn’t get anything from that, well, that’s another another chance in the next chapter I loved when he meets the woman who takes care of the child, and how she talks about having a dedicated grown up or like having someone to take care and answer questions from the child, and treat them as a, you know, someone with a brain who is worthy of getting answers and not getting dismissed. Like I thought about like it would Tobia for me that we could offer all our children that but it was just so nice to hear someone say it. I was like that’s so beautiful. Like Yeah, I wish that for everyone, that they had a dedicated patient grown up to answer all their questions and take care of their needs and treat them as a whole human very early on.

Absolutely, it’s one of those. There’s so many into in the celsion prophecy, it’s all the different insights, which is why the Danish version is called nine insights. And I think that one is insight six.

Which by the way, makes perfect sense. I’m just gonna say in numerology six is family and love. It’s the energy if you are six, that that’s one of your lessons, lessons in love and boundaries, and caring and being in service to others. So yeah, I don’t know, that’s just, maybe I should look over, like, the insights from the numbers. I really like a summary of them so that you don’t have to read the whole book to read.

So I wanted to read a couple little blips out of it, because I think it’ll also give our readers something to connect with to be like, Yes, I want to read it. And right now, I did see last week that celsion prophecy is on amazon prime to watch. I have not watched the movie and there’s

a lot. I don’t know,

yeah, there’s just certain books that I’m like, I’m never gonna watch the movie. So if you won’t watch the book, I mean, if you won’t read the book, then watch the movie, because something’s better than nothing. But read the book instead of watch the movie, if you’ve got the energy, and it’s a simple, easy book to read. So one of them I love is, we all have a spiritual purpose and mission that we have been pursuing without being fully aware of it. And once we bring it completely into consciousness, our lives take off. Mm hmm. Like, I love that. And that goes completely in line with,

excuse me,

as talking about reclaiming and reclaiming our lives and our full episode. Because once we realize what our purpose is our spiritual mission, our life does really start to flow. And if your life is in that much Roadblock, you have to sit back and look and be like, okay, where am I not in flow? How can I find that? Because I know there’s been points in my life that I was so not in flow that I was like, Oh, it’s hard, because I have to prove how hard I want it. No. BS. There’s no proven anybody if you’re in flow your life and it doesn’t mean your life is easy. But it means that it’s not like one roadblock after roadblock after roadblock after roadblock. It means that there are definitely challenges you have to work through. But you should be in flow and feel that like, Ah, okay, there’s rapids on the river. But you’re still moving forward.

Yes, yes, yes, yes.

Okay, then I have to flip through. And like, remember all the places I had highlighted, because

I’ve got so many spots to talk about. I’m the poster girl with that. Like, my books are full of posters. Sometimes when I open them, they just fall out. And I’m like, No, where were we I have to pick you back.

We you know, it’s funny, because I always use a pin. But in this book, I use the highlighter. And I’m like, there’s a reason I don’t highlight because I used this book a year ago, and I and my eyes are old, and it’s hard to find.

Mm hmm. Okay

so this part I love because I think this is very much in our culture right now. It talks about negative thoughts. But what about negative thoughts? I asked those fear images of something bad, such as someone we love getting hurt, or of not achieving something we want? Because I know I’m going to step out of the book for a minute, because I know I believe so strongly in manifestation. And sometimes I say, am I manifesting something bad to happen? Or is it a premonition, and so this is what I love about how he says it. Very simple. Pablo said, the seventh insight says that fear images should be halted as soon as they come. Then another image, one with a good outcome should be willed through the mind. Soon, negative images will almost never happen. Your intuitions will be about positive things. When negative images come after that the manuscript says they should be taken very seriously and not followed. For instance, if the idea comes to you that you’re going to have a wreck in a truck, and someone comes along and offers your ride in a truck, then don’t accept it. And I love that because we do in our culture so strongly right now. There’s so much fear in the universe. And feeling it between elections and COVID. And, you know, everything else going on recession, all that stuff that I know, I was sick last week, like super sick, actually went got kind of tested because I was that sick, and I hadn’t left the house in six days. So it was like, you know, and so it was very fearful to me, thankfully, you know, rapid testing and it was only like six hours till I could get an appointment and it came back negative. But I felt so much fear that it took me a couple days to realize that I was so tapped into the universe’s fear that I had to Go have it. And so I love that. Talking about like, when that image comes to mind a fear of negative things to immediately replace it with something positive, and get so good at that, so that when something does come, you know, it’s a premonition, it’s not you manifesting something.

And it’s also I mean, what I would call like spiritual hygiene. Sometimes when people are very focused on negativity and protection and talking about the dark forces, yeah, like getting very Star Wars II, like, you know, the safe, like, I’m feeling like, I’m sure there’s lots of bad energy out there. But I think it’s fear more than anything. And to me, spire spiritual hygiene is like, I clear my field, I clear my thoughts. I have a plan of like, would certain things come up? Then this is what I do. I watch bloopers on YouTube, I, you know, I do something until it shifts and it might take a short period of time might take a long period of time, I also laugh at my own dramatic nature. You know, I know that’s what makes me a good actor is my depth of feeling. And sometimes I have to be like, this guy is not following your pmse. Okay. Matthew? Yeah. And it’s just like, we clear. So we can expand because we do not clear and we do not expand and we do not question or thought patterns, then we will just get smaller and smaller. And we think we need protection from everything. And we set ourselves up and we close ourselves off. And then we become a little closed system that just runs on fear.

Mm hmm. Absolutely. No,

I mean, usually when people are like, of course, if you have an anxiety attack, then like, that’s different. But if you’re having like a, like a little mental circle of fear and sadness, sometimes you need something to snap you out of it. And you need to have the tools. I mean, right at the first thing in your calendar, or put it on your phone of like, the things that cheer me up, are these things, and not okay, I actually thought about that earlier when we’re talking like, not things that soothe you in a negative way. shortcake cheers me up. But, you know, there’s a difference between stuffing my face with shady cake. And then if it is if it’s cake, and I think that’s going to solve my problem right now, I’d better be the best cake ever. Like then I might really like splurge and get myself the thing where the first bite is, like, you know, Joy explosion in my mouth. Like, it’s also like, yeah, it needs to be things that snap us out of it. And not just something that soothes and fills the hole and makes us numb. Absolutely.

I love that you said that. And using food is such a thing, because we’re all emotional eaters. And when you send something that soothes you, I immediately thought of this rose quartz crystal that I have that’s bigger than my hand. Hmm. And that’s where I like to go to soothe myself.

Yeah. And it’s also like, it’s totally okay to sue us. But we need to be mindful about what it is. And that’s also like, I mean, I love bloopers. Not super spiritual, but I love it. Because the thing that I love is, of course, that people are so present, usually when there’s a bloopers because people mess up because they’re not super present. Because if you’re super present, you usually don’t mess up. So I love it because it gives me a very present moment with the actor. And it’s usually funny. And then I get a lot of present moment, energy and a lot of joy and a lot of laughter. And you can’t keep your negative for long. If you keep in the present moment. And just for the record, puppy videos are my favorite kind of bloopers just to share. There’s a group on Facebook called the dodo club

Oh my gosh, you need to follow them on Facebook because it’s 1030 at night when you’re laying in bed and can’t fall asleep. You will laugh and wake your husband up. And my husband now follows them. So tired of me sharing videos.

Love that. Well, thank you so much for your time and our full length episode about reclaiming you. Thank you for talking to me about self esteem prophecy.

Thank you. I love that book.

I know that our listeners will reach out to you. I hope that our listeners will read Celestine prophecy and then reach out to me so we can have more conversations about.

Yes.

So thank you so much again for your time. You’ve been an awesome guest and I just sincere grateful for the connection with

you. Thank you. My pleasure. Best way to spend the day.