Thank you for your grace about rescheduling. I just bought Kevin even ended up with it earlier this week. So it’s or two days ago, so it’s just kind of been running rampant through our house and
Bill getting over mine last week I was a max, probably. It was like a, like, kind of like sinus thing. So it’s like, you can’t even hear yourself all that well. Just like I didn’t want to be, you know, on film going.
That’s what I was so afraid of is like, I was like, I could pull it together. But what if I have a sneezing fit in the middle? Cuz I was just like, when it first started, I thought it was my cat because I had been playing with a cat. And then later my husband’s like, you’ve washed your face like four times in the last two hours and you’re not any better.
Like not I think you’re sick. Yeah.
So how was your
heart when you’re in denial? If you’re like, I’m not sick? Totally not.
I mean, it came down hard Saturday, and I had plans on Sunday, and I was just mad.
Denial. It’s real. Yeah,
I was on happy to have to cancel. Yeah. Okay. So I am trying to get my bearings straight for us. Because I want to respect your time. Are you on a timeframe?
I’m good. I’m good today. Yeah, I’ve got something not until like, yeah, no, I’m good. Okay. And Thursday’s are great, because I teach Thursday nights. And so I already was gonna have to, like, do my hair and my makeup. I don’t teach. Like, why would I do those? I got Yeah, I feel like for you. Yeah, Monday would have been like an extra like, getting pretty day. And so this is way better. I love birthdays on one day and my friends asked me, you know, can we have a party for you? And I was like, Yeah, I want it small. I want like, it’s just gonna be like game night. And the theme is loungewear. Like glasses, yoga pants. Literally, no one try.
Jericho. I love that. This last year, you called you win a prize.
The more I appreciate you being vulnerable, and you’re slouching so I’m, I’m all about it.
I love that. That. Is it a big birthday for you know, that’s why it’s just a birthday.
Yeah, it’s 46 and it’s on a Monday night. Like I was literally planning on skipping it altogether. So yeah. Tiffany a might.
I mean, I think that sounds like a great way to spend your birthday as long as there’s a little wine maybe involved to you or something. You know, yoga one yoga pants one they kind of go together after
dark. I don’t you wine but I Do. Do. I’ve got my little I’ve got these little cool cannabis CBD drinks. Out of those. Yeah. What state are you in?
North Carolina? We’re the Bible Belt. We are literally the Bible Belt. You still can’t buy alcohol here on Sundays. Oh, I
know. I lived in Nashville for 10 days. Right? Yeah. But I honestly, it is the Bible Belt. But I think with North Carolina, it’s more tobacco lobby compete with us and bring like amp and like all these things into our state because we’ll lose money.
You know, I never thought about that. That makes sense. Hmm. Yeah.
Yeah, there are these great drinks. They’re called can ca Nn. And they’re a little bit of THC, a little bit of CBD. And for some reason my body likes them and other things. It just flares up. So
yeah, I would totally like that better than wine. I mean, I like wine. But I would totally like that better even. Yeah, that’s funny. My son’s gonna listen to this podcast while he’s editing and he’s gonna be like, Mom, can we go visiting aunt Kathy? San Francisco. Yeah. I’ll have to remember to be like anybody while you’re listening to that. Oh, yeah. Kevin suddenly is gonna buy a ticket to visit his aunt and he hasn’t seen too funny. Well, I hope it’s a wonderful birthday for you.
Thank you. Oh, yeah. Birthday surgery on Sunday is it’s Halloween and I’m marrying a couple. Um, they’re eloping. So that’s like, I’m honestly more excited about that.
That’s super fun.
I’m on the on the cliff like right in front of the ocean and they’re wearing all black it’s very like Halloween and I’m, you know, I’m like, Oh my God. It’s such a Scorpio Wang like count me in. So I were in all black. Like, I’m just very excited about it.
Oh, my gosh, that sounds amazing. Yeah. Fine. You’ll have to send me a picture just so that I can see because I have this image in my mind, and I need it to live up to that.
I’ve actually never been to the spot. Because I mean, I’m I’m ridiculously spoiled. I’m a block from the beach. So I have plenty of beach views, you know, wherever I need. And this is pretty, you know, far south downtown, so, but it’s pretty well known. It’s called like sunset cliffs. So I’m very excited.
Yeah, I figured it must be something special. If people are getting married. They’re like, it’s either special here or it’s so pretty that like you got to like, it’s kind of like in the movie Greece, where they’re all at Lookout Point. Like, that’s sufficient is that they’re all like, lined up getting married. That’s funny. Cool. Well, I’m excited for you. But yeah, I would I totally want to see a picture just because a sucker for weddings and stuff like
that. Oh, yeah. Well, I’m the dress. I’m very excited. I do Rent the Runway whenever I have, like an event like that. So yeah, you know, I don’t have all you know, tons of clothes and stuff. So. So I found a really cool black dress. I’m very excited. And I might I’ve got like, a little like one of those like, feather like masquerade masks. So if they want me to be like, dressed up since Halloween, I’m just gonna bring that but that’s about it. Yeah. Because it’s literally like, two hours before my birthday. So I’ve just I always I love Halloween. I love getting dressed up. And yeah, yeah. And when I can’t be like, Hi. Yeah, so my poor mother who had to deal with me eating gobs and gobs of candy. And then birthday cake. Like, I probably did not come down for a full week. So
she was the mom who snuck into your room in the middle of the night and hid your Halloween candy from you. I’m sure she never did that.
But the the family trauma that my parents that my sister and I still remind my dad of is one year we’d get home. We take our pillowcases, we dump them out on the kitchen table. And we’d we’d make two piles one chocolate and like things that could melt and then non chocolate. And they’d go in separate bowls. And then the chocolate bowl would go like in the refrigerator, you know so and, and one year we came down and the next day and the entire chocolate ball was bowl was gone. My parents had like just
lost all control whatsoever. And it was so traumatic. You’re like, don’t worry.
Don’t maybe now it’s hysterical. But like back then it was like seriously? Because he wants the non chocolate candy. Like that’s just like,
Oh, yeah. And when we were kids, the non chocolate candy was not good. Like now. You’ve got sour patch kids, and you’ve got you’ve got other stuff, but when we were kids, yeah, it was not good.
It was horrible. So yeah, yeah. But we’ve forgiven them. It’s all good.
Therapy. I love it. Oh my gosh, that cracks me up. Now I have to tell my son like how lucky he is. Again, he’ll hear this and I’ll be like, remember, Kathy, you’re really lucky. Do that to you, Tiffany. Well, I love that we have this like banter going on. Because I’m like, oh my god, like just need to get started so that we can talk because it’s gonna be a great conversation.
It’s awesome. I can’t wait.
Yeah. And I can already tell you’re one of the guests because I have a couple guests that afterwards. I’m like, Can we stay in touch and you know, we still touch base once a month and stuff. I’m like, Yeah, I’m gonna do that. Totally. Yeah. Tell me how to pronounce your last name.
shawls. Like, okay, you’d wrap around your shoulders, okay. Or what your grandmother would wrap around her shoulders? I don’t know. If people stole their shells.
That’s it. I wasn’t sure if I was gonna butcher it or not.
It’s a weird one. No one and we’ve got show lace shales, shackle bees someone. Yeah, literally, it just people panic. They see it and they don’t recognize it. And they’re just like, Ah, so yeah, you’re not the first person.
My husband’s last name is Missy M i in i Si. And I took it as my middle name because it’s not going to take it as my last name because my last name is Greer. You can’t mess up gr e are like and and sometimes I give his last name just to freak a waitress out you know or like the girl at the checkout because I’ll say it and she just looks at me I’m like, am I and I you know just a mess with them because
oh no, I mean, literally my entire life like my I don’t consider my last name to be shawls I considered to be Scholls sh au Le s spell it for everyone and no one can figure it out. And I’ve gone back and forth, you know, my website is Emily shawls.com. And I’m like, is that smart? You know, like because, you know, fake kits spell it. They can’t find me. I guess I should buy up like all the misspellings, but I figured someone said it was a famous, Oh, Mia, like Mojo hausky or something like that. She’s an actress. She, you know, she said she had agents and managers telling her to change her last name. And she’s like, if people can learn how to spell Schwarzenegger, they can learn how to
like, Girl, I like that as well. And if I get famous enough, they’ll know how to spell my Google well,
they will know how to spell shawls.
That’s hysterical. Well, when we, when we end the episode, I always say, you know, where can my followers find you? You can say it however you want to spell it or whatever.
I’ll repeat it. Thank you.
Yeah, well, and I generally like to start the episode with a quote. And then kind of we take a pause, and then I do my introduction of you. And then I flip it back to you and say, you know, welcome. Now tell me who your friends know you as, and that’s a chance for you to get a little more into you before we start the conversation. So the quote I found, and I don’t know if this fits for you or not, but it was really striking to me. Courage is not having the strength to go on. It is going on when you don’t have the strength. Oh, damn, hell, yeah. Teddy Roosevelt. Okay. Okay, so I wanted to make sure cuz I was like, I don’t know if that’s too bad.
No, that’s okay. Yeah, I’m gonna have to make a meme out of that.
Yeah, well, and what I’ll also do is I make it into a design an image, your, your name and the episode on it. So I’ll send that to you. A couple other things.
Oh, thank you. That’s awesome. Yeah, yeah.
I mean, you’re welcome to use it any other way you want? Yeah.
How can I? Yeah, I gotta make I gotta make camp a thing.
Yeah, well, and I normally find two or three quotes to give guest an option. And I found that one. I was like,
No, hold on to that. I mean, that’s what I what I teach, if something like hits you and strikes you and you’re like, like up your answer, but I mean, you gotta you gotta trust that.
Yeah, that’s kind of how I felt. And then we’ll we’ll wrap up the episode. And then we’ll talk for a second and then we’ll start the bonus episode where we just talk about Joe Dispenza. You have any questions for you get started.
Now I think I’m good.
Now I’ve got my like gender tablets in case I start to cough. Water. I’m the only one home though. And so normally, my husband likes dogs on the other side of the house, but I can’t because they’ll freak out stuff like, oh, that may come trotting through the room. We’ll see what i Yeah, cuz I think when they do show up. Well, we’ll have to. I know you and I talked about how much you love animals and that you pets it. Yeah. By the time I My husband doesn’t edit these. So he won’t know. But my husband’s out of town. He’s been out of town for two days. He’s not coming home until Sunday. And yesterday. The cutest little kitten showed up stray in the neighbor’s yard. I’ll be honest with you. It wasn’t the neighbor’s yard. It wasn’t in our yard. But it’s in my laundry room now. For two days, and I saw I told Matthew Yeah. But like our dogs started freaking out, jump in like going crazy. And Kevin and his girlfriend were here. And they were outside. So I’m like, What are you guys doing? What’s making the dog freak out? Yeah, I don’t know. He’s freaking out outside too. So we went outside and you could hear it now. And so all three of us immediately were like, there’s it sounded really distressed, you know. And so we all went different directions. We live on a very small dead end street at the back of a neighborhood that backs up to a horse farm. But the highway is, you know, kind of that way. Yeah. You get through the woods that way. And some reason we get strays dropped off. Most of them are skittish of us. So we just feed them on the porch for years. Sure. And yeah, our neighbor across the street leaves her garage open and always has food. So a lot of them go in there. But this one was so lovey, and like jumped right up to me and we sat down with it. It went from like our laps back and forth, back and forth. And I was like, okay, yeah, you bring it inside. And it happens. Exactly like my cat that I lost a few years ago. That was when I lost her.
Oh boy. Yeah, you didn’t stand a chance.
Oh, I didn’t at all. So so we’ll see what happens if we get disturbed by animals because my dog may come running through the room looking for the gas. Very cool. Okay. So I’m going to give us a couple seconds of silence, I’m going to read the quote, and then I’ll give it another couple of seconds of silence because that gives Kevin a chance to edit it for us. Courage is not having the strength to go on. It is going on when you don’t have the strength. Theodore Roosevelt welcome to today’s episode of grounding journey, I have my guest Emily shawls with me. And we’ve already been talking for 20 minutes before I said, Okay, we’ve got to start recording. So I’m super excited that Emily’s here with me and I should give you the formal introduction of her. She is a transformational coach who works primarily with women who have an invisible illness. And that really interested me because I have so many friends who are there. And she wants them to feel better and design a life that excites them. She’s the creator of a free online, shift yourself retreat. And we’re going to talk about that later. Because it sounds really exciting. And it started soon. And she, she came to this place of working with women with invisible illness, because of her own personal experience. And so that’s what we want to talk about today. Emily, first off, welcome. I’m so excited. You’re here. I love chatting with you.
I know this is like the beginning of a beautiful friendship.
Yes. And you know, I feel a little guilty that I am ear to ear smiling giggling and we’re going to talk about such a serious subject. But I think that the listeners, once they spend a few minutes listening to you will understand just this radiance you bring to it and how much fun it is to talk to you. So I’m super excited. Yeah, absolutely. Now tell us because I’ve given the formal, inner duction. But I want to know who Emily really is like, tell us what your friends would say about you who they think you are. Oh, I
love that question. My friends would probably say I’m a light, and that I’m inspiring to them. Which when you go through invisible adults, it’s kind of par for the course. You can make it through the days like you’re going to inspire someone.
I would say loving, obsessed with dots. And a great dancer.
Well, you know, that’s one of the things because I always have the question of any questions you’d love answering. And one of the things that first attracted me to wanting to talk to you it’s anything regarding dogs dancing, or 90s. Hip Hop. Yes. Like, who doesn’t want to talk
to you after that? Seriously of way, it’s my jam.
Yeah, well, and that was we’ll have to admit the first like, or the last few minutes before we actually started recording was talking about cats and, and all that kind of stuff.
And me saying like, I hope your animals come in during recording. Yeah, I’m back girl. Yeah.
I love that. Well, and as I said to you, and people who listen to my podcast regularly have heard guest appearances of my dogs when the mail truck comes. And I’m home alone today. So there’s no telling what’s gonna happen with us today. So, of course, now I’ve given that disclaimer, they’ll probably behave, but we’ll see what happens. Well, let’s talk Emily. So you have dealt with invisible illness. And I know you shared a little bit about your story with me. But I would love for you to kind of take our listeners. I think maybe we’ll start with what is invisible illness so that people who haven’t experienced it may be able to connect it to people in their life. Definitely going through it.
I define invisible illness as any chronic condition, whether it be mental or physical. Where people will say to the person Oh, but you look normal. Something where on the outside, someone appears totally healthy, probably smiling a lot. Oh, I saw a tail. And but inside that person is really struggling. And they put on a brave face, but they’re going through just unimaginable struggles struggle in their daily life and most people have no idea and even those who do you know spouses or kids or partners or friends, if they if they’re not experiencing it, it’s really hard for them to understand fully because the person looks normal. So that’s how I define in physical illness. I first I wondered if I should if I would use the phrase chronic pain but that doesn’t really capture you know, anxiety. Anxiety, depression, things like that. But it does, but not how most people think of it. So invisible illness seem to be a more inclusive term that I use. But yeah, not everyone understands, because they’re, they’re not going through it. But it’s great when they do.
Well, and I think you, you’ve had a couple really valid points of they look fine. And their spouse, or their sibling, or the person they live with doesn’t understand, because they’re not experiencing it. And I would like to add to that, just knowing the couple people I have who I initially immediately related with, when I read your interview stuff, there’s also the people who just put on that brave face. Absolutely have it. And that’s why we picked the core. That’s why I picked the quote that was so meaningful to me is courage is not having the strength to go on. Like it’s not putting on that fake facade. It’s being real and finding it. You hear my dog? Oh, yes, I sorry.
I just I that’s the first time I had heard that particular quote, and I absolutely loved it. I mean, that is that sums up invisible illness, I think in, in so many, because we there are days, I mean, usually it kind of ebbs and flows, and you’ve got good days and bad days. And on the days when it’s not so good. It’s, you do wonder if you want to go on, I’ve told people, many times, you know, I have contemplated suicide in the past, my invisible illnesses are predominantly physical. But when you’re in pain every day, for decades, perhaps it’s hard for that not to affect your mental well being. And the it’s not so much, at least in my experience, it’s not so much that the pain on any particular day is so high that I would want to take my life, it’s more the concept of if this is how I’m going to feel every day for the rest of my life, then, wow, I don’t know if I, if I’m up for that, like, I don’t want to die. I want to live I love life. But the idea of being in pain for the next 3040 50 years, that’s a big thing to get your head around, and it can become overwhelming. And so that quote is, you know, just getting gay sometimes is a is really a huge act of courage, and we should celebrate ourselves for that.
I appreciate you sharing your vulnerability of where you’ve been in the past year, you know, because I think that is so important. And I you know, I immediately think of my mom, who she said 6566 Now, she was diagnosed with fibromyalgia, you know, air quotes, fibromyalgia.
That was one of mine.
Yeah, like 25 years ago. And it was seriously they just the and this is my mom’s story just to kind of connect to where I feel for it is they told her she had fibromyalgia because they couldn’t diagnose her. They put her on. Oh, I forget what it was. But the medication that wasn’t fully diagnosed, it was a narcotic pain medicine, just basically to quiet her down. And the side effects and everything that it has created for her has been so intense and so miserable. Yeah, that you know, and that was a 2030 years ago. So the last half of my mom’s life has been miserable. And and so that’s why having you on today was so powerful to me was to empower women, and then anybody to really find that invisible illness and not just take a blanket diagnosis or be discredited and what you’re feeling because most
people are, is there is there some statistic where people with invisible illness go to like on average 10 or 12 doctors before they receive a diagnosis and it can take years and it’s really it’s really unfortunate, it because then that just adds to the pain that you’re already going through. Have they don’t believe me? Have they think I’m crazy? Or are they like you said they just want me to shut up and get back to things and it’s like, oh my god, I mean, I understand why it happens. I can see it from a doctor’s perspective. But I mean, I gotta say you you always have to err on the side of compassion and believing and trying to help. And that’s just one of the things, stories that I’ve heard many, many times and have experienced in my own life, even with the most well meaning doctors, even with the ones that totally believe you, it can still take years and years. And honestly, there are things that I experience it that I would put under the umbrella of invisible illness that the best doctors still haven’t been able to tell me exactly what’s going on. And so it does. I remember, at one point, getting a diagnosis for something, and I sell it, I was so excited, it was literally like, Yay, you know, because once you have it a disease or whatever you want to call it once you have, then then you can take some action, and it’s like, oh, for this, you did this, and this and this. But if you’re spending years or decades, and you don’t even have that, then it’s basically you’re just in pain, and with absolutely like no course of action to take, and that that can really contribute to a feeling of powerlessness. Because there’s, you know, if you can’t take an action, and what are you going to do, you’re going to just sit and focus on the pain. And that’s probably the worst thing you can do for it.
Well, and I like that you said compassion, because you know, I don’t have this Verity that she has. The The only thing I was ever able to kind of relate is I get a migraine once a month with my female cycle. And it knocks me out for a day. And I always, you know, I’ve missed doing things because of those migraines. And it, it just hurts. And I want to go do that. And I think this is just 10 hours of my life this month. What is it like for somebody who’s dealing with it all the time. And as you shared with us, it’s not that you don’t want to keep going, it’s that you don’t see the, you know, point in the future of it being better. Tell us a little bit more about your journey and how you came to what let’s start with your journey.
Yeah, I mean, cliffnotes version is my symptoms all began when I was in college. Looking back, I you know, I never had the healthiest immune system. I always had allergies, like I was always allergic to nature and animals, and you know, all of that. But my mom and my sister were two, so it was just never something I really considered, you know, wrong. Now looking back, it’s like, oh, okay, yeah, there were issues there that had we dealt with them, it wouldn’t have developed into the other things. But the severe symptoms started my senior year in college when I was applying for law school, so very stressed out. And I went home for Christmas break and had just a breakdown, and they ended up removing my gallbladder and then diagnosing me with ulcerative colitis and irritable bowel disease. So me, you know, the gung ho, you know, type, a stray student, I once died, just kept going. And they put me on some drugs to control the symptoms. And I went right on to law school. And after I graduated from last school, that’s when the fiber broke, fibromyalgia hit. So I had flipped my hair back. Some felt something kind of snapped on my neck. And over the next several months, it just kind of spread everywhere. And that was, you know, the next six, seven years where I was going from doctor to doctor trying all of these pills. But I was on 25 pills a day, by the time I was 38, it was just a blank storm, if you if you will. And so and after those seven years, that’s when I got into natural health. That’s when I discovered like alternative medicine and all these things because it just nothing I was trying, I was getting worse and worse. I wasn’t getting better. And so that was the beginning of me. Really shifting everything I shifted my diet. I shifted, you know, I started meditating I started getting into like yoga, I started doing all these things and really diving into the the mind body connection. And that’s, you know, that I haven’t stopped doing just because it’s it they’re all so tied in and you know, I didn’t obviously stay being a lawyer that was just way too stressful. And me trying to work 80 hours a week when I’m you know, feeling horrible. It was just impossible. And so it really, I I believe my journey with my illness has been my greatest teacher in this lifetime and I’m truly I can honestly say I am truly grateful for the lessons that has taught me do I wish I my soul my have changed, chose a different path. Sure. But, um, I a big a big step in my journey was this feeling of acceptance, not acceptance of that the pain is going to be here forever because I still work daily to lessen it and to cure it and to help it. But just the acceptance of what is of right now. This is how I feel, this is what I’m capable of doing. Instead of me saying, Well, let me try and force myself to work 80 hours a week, because around me is doing it. And that’s what I did for years. And that’s what most people with invisible illness do. Because we got bills to pay, we got kids to take care of we got a you know, we have all this stuff. But what I really came to was, for me to even have a chance at getting better, I had to really design my life around the illness, not in a like let me look at it all day every day. But just reality of it so that I could that that was the me taking care of me. And not living in some place of I’m going to try and be something that I can’t that’s really hurting me, because that’s just that’s crazy making that’s, that makes you feel worse mentally physically, like all the things and then you’re not really even able to be fully there for the people that and the responsibilities that you do have.
Yeah, well, and I would love to touch base. There were a couple of things you said. One thing when you said that your journey to your illness was one of your greatest gifts. And then you commented that having the illness you had to do things different because people just push and I think sometimes when we don’t listen, our bodies tell us something has to be different. And I use that my dad was diagnosed with cancer. When I was in eighth grade, ninth grade. It didn’t look good. Yeah. And he, he started out as a painter for a company in town. And when he retired, he was vice president of this same company, but it was a huge conglomerate that owned half of our town at that point. And he really worked his way up. And I watched him. And so growing up, I was like, you have to have this great work ethic, work ethic and, and push and all that stuff. And I remember that. And then he got hit with cancer. And he faced not seeing his kids graduate, and his entire life changed. And I to this day say that one of my greatest gifts was my dad’s cancer. Absolutely. My dad just turned 77. Last month. Yeah, I don’t think so. You know, he did make it and he did overcome because he did that complete shift. Yes, he still has cancer, I can still see it on his body. He’s had it for 40 years now. 30 years. But I think part of that, like you said listening, changing your diet, finding those meditative yoga, relaxing things is part of our responsibilities to our bodies. Absolutely. Our body’s going to tell us when we’re off centered. And and
we live in an off centered society. Yeah, that is, that is the biggest thing that is like literally the first people, the first thing that I teach people I work with is that you are not broken, you are not defective. You live in a really amped up world, and you’re trying to keep up and maybe you’re a little more sensitive, then you know you’re born in a more sensitive body than someone else. Or maybe you had trauma that contributed to it, or for whatever reason, you’re not handling the pressures of society as as maybe as well as other people are seemingly as well. However, even the people who are seemingly handling the pressure society, it’s not in their best interest to do so. Right? We’re not put on this earth. It is my firm belief. We were not put on this earth to work 80 hours a week, and collapse in front of our TVs and have our phones and a bottle of wine every night just to make it through the week and only be focused on money and profit and all of these things like it’s not natural. It’s not optimum surroundings and environments for for for any human being to live in. And so I call I call the those of us with invisible illness canaries and that’s the name of my coaching program is the canary club because it’s this. It’s this way for us to reclaim that sensitivity but your sensitivity is actually your superpower. You are You being sensitive, that comes with wonderful gifts, that if you really tap into, and again kind of design your life around, can benefit tons of people. And also, you feel better doing it that way. So we’re the canaries in the coal mine of Hey, guys, how are doing things just, it just isn’t working anymore, you know, like feeding our kids, Franken foods, and, you know, having just all these like environmental, like toxins around and all these things. It’s just not natural. So it’s not your fault. But it is what it is. And so it is your responsibility to yourself and to those that you love to look at things and change things that you need. Most people who survived cancer will look back and say, that was the greatest teacher of my life. Because most of us, unfortunately need a really big wake up call in order for us to actually change our lives.
Man, I call it that, but my dad winks at me. Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. Well, and I think like that little few minutes of you talking, I was like, there’s three more episodes of a podcast over, you know, just, I love that you call it canaries. That’s a great analogy. Looking at the fact that we’re doing it wrong. And where have we strayed from doing it? Right. And when did we stop listening? Yeah. When did we stop listening to our body? When did we stop listening to nature? And I think that’s so important. And you know, we all do it. We’re all at fault society. It’s not anything like that. But it’s just yeah. How can we as a collective comeback? So tell me a little bit about your journey, once you found discovered that you felt it was an invisible illness? I don’t know. I feel like I just didn’t say that. Right. Once you connected with being invisible illness, what was your path other than changing your your foods? And meditation and stuff? How did you get yourself? Because as talking, you seem to? I’m trying to pick the right words. But you don’t seem you’re in the place you were before? Because you Oh, absolutely on it.
Oh my god.
I don’t want to say like for our listeners, when I look at you, you’re glowing, you have a great personality, you don’t look like you’re faking it. Because from being somebody who put a fake face on for a long time I go I see each other. And like you have a sparkle. So I don’t want to do that. But you look fine. Right? You look like you’re in a better place now. So how did you get from there to here?
Thank you. It, it has been a almost 15 year journey now and a journey that I will continue the rest of my life. And it really was me examining every aspect of my life and saying, is this serving me. And for me, it really started with learning about the spiritual laws and the hermetic laws that are throughout nature are the basis of all major religions. And really discovering my my own power. So I truly believe that we create our own reality, which is an incredibly on one hand depressing. Especially if you’re in a place that you hate, because you’re like, ah, hi, I would not have created this reality. And like, Yeah, you did, you might not have done it willingly or consciously. But you did. On the flip side, that’s an incredibly empowering belief. Because if you if, and I’ll speak for myself, if I got myself into this, I can get myself out. Yes. And so for me, it was really diving in and it’s taken. I mean, it’s a process I’ve gotten, you know, better and better over the years, I’ve had dips, I you know, I’m human, but I’m really learning what my true power is. And then attracting the resources that I need in terms of like, learning about nutrition, learning about all of these practices can can really help you learning about why meditation works, like what the science is behind it. Because I feel that when you know, the science, it helps motivate you to do it. It’s not just kind of this airy, fairy prayer like promise of maybe, you know, it’s it’s actual science, but I looked at my career. I looked at relationships, I looked at friendships I looked at self care, physical things, it’s not just like, oh, I need to take more naps or I need to do this, it’s really examining your thoughts on a day to day basis, because I found that, especially women with invisible animals, but I mean, women in general, we are so self critical, like there is no one who is more critical than us than we are right. And your body hears that. Yes, your body hears your thoughts, your body, everything is connected. So I love this. I’m trying to remember her name, but this woman that who I love, Mel Robbins just came out with the book. And it’s like called the High five, something, and it’s literally the practices high fiving yourself in the mirror every morning. And I’m all about fun little tricks like that I do videos every day, on Instagram, and they’re just called the daily shift, you know, just any little thing that can make you feel better in the moment, because in the moment is all we have. And so if you are in the moment, but you are worrying about the future, or you are freaking out about the past, or replaying it, you’re not really present, you’re not really a choice. And so therefore you’re not in your power. Whereas if you start doing these practices like meditation and yoga that help you become more present, then things slow down more in your head, and you can catch those thoughts. You know, it’s such like, it’s so subconscious, it’s so beneath our level of consciousness that most times we don’t even know that these things are going on. And then when you suddenly hear that you’re like, Oh, my God, I would never let another human being speak to me like that. And I’m saying that like, over and over again, no wonder my body’s kind of malfunctioning because any kind of stress or pain or anything like that is like literally going to release stress hormones in the body, it’s going to lower your immune system, it’s going to like all of the things that your body needs to be able to, you know, look bright and lively and, and have energy and just be a relaxed, loving human being, you really need to take care of yourself. And for me it really believe it begins in my in my thoughts. And then I layer on all the other practices on top of that.
I, you have all this great wisdom in these, like three minutes that you say something, so trying to go back and not miss these bullet points that you had. And I’m trying not to write them down because I want to say so here. But one of the things that really stuck out to me when you said was knowing the science behind meditation. And I think that validating that in the sense of sometimes it doesn’t taste great to eat vegetables, but you know what the benefit of them is, so you eat them. So when you’re starting to meditate, and I am such a fan of meditation, and you and I have that in common, and our bonus episode is going to be all about Joe Dispenza. Because knowing the science of what it does to you. And as you mentioned, your immune system, and your nervous system, and all the working parts in our body and all the spindles and wheels and everything that’s happening in our body, knowing how they play together. And how they function together. puts your body back at Harmony.
Yes. Ah, the human body is an absolute miracle. And I honestly don’t think it really makes a whole lot of mistakes, you know, it is responding to the environment that it has put in, meaning your thoughts, what foods you’re eating, what what substances you might be breathing in, what stress level you’re under. And so if things are going wrong, it it’s easy to say, oh, you know, my stupid body I’m broken. It’s, you know, it shouldn’t be happening like this. But again, if your body is hearing, I’m broken. I’m defective, then guess what? It’s gonna act broken and defective. Whereas if you’re say, if you’re loving yourself and treating yourself as you would you know your child who is in pain, then suddenly your body can relax enough to I mean, the nervous system is literally like the cause of pretty much everything is just getting like the nervous system back to into regulation that suddenly genes that that will help you he’ll get turned on. I mean, you can either upregulate a gene or you can down regulate a gene. So it’s not necessarily the gene. It’s not like oh, I got stuck with bad genes. It’s the environment that you put the Gene in. And so, yes, you might have been given a less than ideal genetic blueprint, you know. But you do have power over what environment you put your genes into. And so let’s just give them as much help as you can, and then see what happens there.
No, I think that’s exactly. Just looking at our genes, and how we can support them, and not distort them anymore.
And that goes for everyone. I don’t care if you have an invisible illness or not, like do you? Like, do you want to live into your 80s 90s? Hundreds and feel good, you can read people around the world do it all the time. Most people in the United States don’t unfortunately, but like, that’s due to our lifestyle. It’s not due to how it’s supposed to be we’ve kind of been brainwashed of like, oh, that’s just how it is when you get older and blah, blah, blah, like, no, there are people there are literally people in their 90s having sex still, you know,
I mean, that’s a visual, I don’t want but that’s my
experience I was when I first sure you know, like, there are people that the natural way to pass as a human being is to go to sleep one night, you don’t wake up. It’s not, we don’t have to, we’ve just been conditioned to believe that we have to like, decline and get sick and like all and suffer basically, before we leave this earth and no, so that’s just not what I believe. I believe we can really be like happy, healthy, happy, healthy, happy, healthy dead. That’s, that’s at least what I’m putting out into the world, because that’s the experience I want to get back. So yeah, it really taking your power back in terms of what do you believe? Are you just kind of accepting what society is spoon feeding you? Because, you know, in terms of like TV and stuff like that, like they don’t call it programming for, for nothing like it is this. I mean, there’s a whole bunch of science on that, too. But it’s this, this way of conditioning people to accept limitations, usually just so they can sell you something, you know, they need, you know, and, and it doesn’t have your best interests at heart. And so really getting clear about what your beliefs are. And if they’re serving you great, stick with them. If they’re not a belief is just a thought you keep thinking. So replace it with a new belief. And yeah, it might take a little while to get it it like ingrained, or that you believe it more than the old belief. But oh my god, what else are you going to be doing like your hair like that’s time very well spent. And I will, I will go back to something you said about like the eating vegetables. I as a child loathe vegetables, like literally, I once almost died at my dinner table because I choked on a piece of asparagus. Oh, okay, because I learned this trick with peas. That if I just put a whole bunch of peas on my spoon, I could swallow them whole with taking a sip of water. That’s how much I hated vegetables. I didn’t I didn’t even want to chew them. But of course, I wasn’t allowed to leave the table until I ate them. And so when I tried that with asparagus eat got lodged in my throat. Like maneuver so and now. Like all I eat their vegetables, and I love them. And biggest thing because I used to be really into like the low sugar. That was a previous business of mine. Your taste buds change. Yes. As you clean up your diet, so something might not taste great. You now literally might turn into your favorite food ever. Yeah, once you’ve kind of detox the chemicals out of your out of your system, because food manufacturers, they’re not like just putting stuff out there like oh, let’s see, they have food scientists, they have things called excitotoxins that literally, like overwhelm your tastebuds so that you crave whatever it is you just ate. I mean, there are so many ways that you can be that your taste buds can your sense of taste can basically be screwed up. And so it’s so important once I mean now like I said I love healthy stuff. So if I can change like girl who’s literally will not even show a vegetable into someone who loves vegetables, like anyone can do it. It’s just going to take some time and some effort but oh my god, is it worth it?
Yes. So my story is lima beans. and are centerpiece on the dining room table because my dad would get up from the table to clean up kitchen while I still had to finish eating and stuff in the centerpiece. And then after he went to bed, I’d go clean out the centerpiece each night. I did actually admit to him a couple years ago.
Brilliant. Oh, man, I wish I would have known that.
But you know, when you’re talking about that, like, what immediately went to my mind is how every time you drive by Burger King, their particular restaurant has the smell that they walked into the air that has you salivating? Absolutely, and I, I personally am gluten intolerant because of the gluten sensitivity. And I’ve been gluten free for almost seven years now. Yeah. And we had some I love diet mac and cheese because it’s dairy free and gluten free. And mac and cheese is my comfort food. So like once a month I get that. Like we were eating it recently with my cousin and his wife who are not gluten intolerant and have not eaten in my household for seven years like my boys. And she was just complaining about how horrible it was. And I said to my son, you eat real mac and cheese and you eat this. Is there really a difference? Yeah, but it’s that whole, like, I have no idea because to me it was a treat. Oh, absolutely.
And completely. Now, if I were to eat something that I used to eat, it would taste horrible to me. And I tried that I went like years and years and didn’t have like a Snickers bar and then tried one that was like, oh, like it? No, it tastes like it just tastes unnatural chemicals, much sugar, you know, all of that. And I will say honestly, this whole kind of concept, it applies to your thoughts and your personality as well. Okay, we think of ourselves as having this like intact personality, and way of thinking and way of being in the world. And again, that’s just something we’ve practiced, it can be changed. So again, I will use myself as an example because I feel like that’s, I don’t I never want to speak for someone else. All I know, is me. But in eighth grade for a poll that they did for the yearbook, I was literally voted the most pessimistic.
I would have never guessed that about you. Right.
Like, no, that’s so not me anymore. But it’s something that I worked on, and, you know, put an effort into and learned the power of my thoughts. And I thought well, okay, if this is true, then I really got to change this way of being. But it’s, it’s, it applies to everything, like how can we kind of detox the the unnatural, the typical societal expectations of us? How can we add good things, good beliefs, good food, good, all of these practices into our lives. And then over time, we feel better and better, not only not only physically, but emotionally and a lot of times honestly. I’m okay, with some physical pain during the day, I’ve gotten used to it, I mean, you know, it my pain has, has decreased immensely over the years, but there are definitely days I mean, I have pain every day. But if my mind is in a good place, I’m okay. It’s when my mind goes into a dark place that I can’t handle this. And so all I can do are the things that I have control over. And I know when I do ABCD II I feel better and when I don’t I feel worse and so it is that’s just how I choose to live in order to be able to be happy and actually try and serve other people because that’s what I found for me is the fastest way to get out of depression anxiety is to serve another not taking not sacrificing yourself not working yourself to death in order you know that’s the like I’m not talking about going into like codependency I’m talking about if I’m too in my head too focused on my pain. I can’t help anyone because I’m stuck inside my own head whereas if I can get out of my head and focus on serving another I’m distracted from my own pain. Which lesson said
I love that and I really love just the for you the illness is the whole body because and there are definitely times that we need to go to a doctor when you have cancer. You need to get it out if it’s you know on an organ as I’m not knocking doctors because I think doctors are really great And I remember when my son had a pediatrician because I was so into herbs. And I mean, I still am, obviously. But I would go to the doctor for a diagnosis. And I remember one time because I didn’t have an on antibiotics, you know, he had a tooth infection, and I put them on for that. Yeah, because I wasn’t gonna get oils and nose mouth. But I remember one particular time our son had an ear infection. And the doctor diagnosed it and looked at me and said, So how are you going to treat it? And that was the best compliment that the doctor knew me enough to say, here’s your diagnosis about it.
That’s awesome. That’s, that’s how medicine should be in my opinion. I mean, it should be a conversation. Yes. Between the doctor, you know, someone who has studied something, and the patient. But a lot of times like, especially in allopathic medicine, everything is like, you know, billable hours and like how many people can they see in one day, and so I don’t knock doctors, it’s not like, I think that they’re evil, and they’re trying to hurt us, I think that they’re trained in a certain system. And that’s how they see. And that’s, that’s what they go for. They go for, you know, medication, surgery, things like that. But it should be a partnership, but that’s also recognizing that the patient then has a responsibility to be involved in their own treatment, if possible. Obviously, there are times when that’s not possible, like allopathic medicine, it’s awesome for emergencies. I’m getting hit by a truck, like Yeah, I want an ER, God like God bless. But especially for a lot of these chronic and physical illnesses. It’s, it’s not the greatest place, they just don’t have the knowledge, the expertise, they don’t have the understanding. So I always suggest people find like a really great if they can, if in their area, find a really great integrative doctor, someone who you know, has both both sides, you can have an MD who also believes in the power of natural remedies. And how about we try this. And then this can be a last resort, if none of these things work. Or this can be kind of a stopgap, like if someone’s in real pain, like if someone’s like having a mental breakdown? Hell yeah. Give them give them some medication to stabilize them. Yes, but then let’s not ignore all of the other factors that are are contributing, let’s start dealing with those lesson. And then maybe, maybe you’re still on the medication, maybe you’re on for the rest of your life, but maybe you don’t have to be on as much, right maybe, or maybe you just feel better while you’re on it. So it should be kind of a team effort. And it can be just need to do some research, find the best doctor that you can find, afford, etc, etc. And hopefully, the system will improve as we’re waiting.
Yeah, well, and you know, because I want to make sure that our audience doesn’t think that we’re down on doctors, and I feel like not at all he said that. But you know, one of my favorite people in the world has some severe mental health issues and needs to be medicated for it. Because there’s a chemical imbalance that can’t get balanced. But one of the things his doctor says over and over and over again, is what you eat, and how much you exercise plays a huge role in how effective this medication is for you. And he has gone down and his amounts of medication drastically, because he’s really active and how he eats. And so that’s where it’s coming back to the whole body
of exactly, you know, the body, it’s the whole soul. It’s your whole it’s your whole person. It’s everything there. It’s all interconnected.
Well, and so you said that sometimes you still struggle, that if when you’re in pain, but as long as your mind is in the right place. So what do you use? How do you keep your mind in the right place? Or when you realize it’s not there? How do you bring it back?
Yeah, great question there. I mean, obviously, your notes on your answer for personal use. Absolutely. I mean, obviously, like the foundational things, the meditation, the, you know, doing those things on a consistent basis help for those issues, not to come up as much, but when they do. I mean, the biggest thing that I found is for me to give myself a break, like if I’m having a bad day, not trying to force myself to, quote quote, unquote, push through at all costs. And I’m saying, not even necessarily taking the whole day off. If I even just give myself permission to sit down and just be still for 10 minutes. Usually that columns things down enough that I’m in a different frame of mind, I’m maybe my pain has gone down a bit and I can get back. Really good self talk. That’s, I mean, that is absolutely key. And that’s a lot where a lot of people don’t, they just don’t have that it’s, you know, being gentle with yourself and being like, we’re gonna get through this. I mean, literally talking to yourself, like you can talk to your sick child. That is key, having a really strong support system. It doesn’t have to be huge. But if you can have a couple of people in your life, who you really trust, that you can be vulnerable with that you can say, I’m having a bad day, I need some help. Or, like, I’m just I just need a hug, you know, something that people, enough people in your life know the truth. That was something. I remember having a birthday party in Asheville one year, and I wasn’t doing too well. And I just invited my five best friends over. And I just said, Look, this is what’s really going on. Of course, none of them had a clue. Right? But then it was, oh, how can we help? Those are my big, my big ones. I mean, I get into very specifics during like when I’m working with clients on the retreat, but for me, I have found gentleness and self compassion, any actions you take from that place, are going to be beneficial. And not like, not like, Oh, I’m going to go get a manicure. You know, I mean, that’s sometimes that is absolutely. Right. I’m talking about self care, like on a deeper level of really, how am I talking to myself? What am I really prioritizing? So if if my health if I say my health is my number one priority? Does my schedule reflect that does where I’m spending money reflects that. I mean, I would much rather, I used to be kind of a clothes horse. I don’t buy clothes, or shoes or bags anymore. It just doesn’t interest me. Like if I’ve got, you know, if I’ve got an afternoon, instead of going shopping, I’m getting a massage like that so much for me a better way of spending my money that’s really going to be congruent with my priorities, then getting a new purse. You know, no judgment on new purses,
just I mean, every once in a while I want any purse. But more often than not, I want a massage.
But a lot of times I mean, there was a time in my life, especially like during law school, it was, you know, very high stress. I lived in downtown Chicago, two blocks from the Magnificent Mile. And my stress relief was like going and shopping the sales racks. Yeah. You know, like, yeah, I guess you could say that stress relief, but like, I mean, if I would have sat down and maybe journaled about what was actually bothering a lot longer term healing instead of distracting myself with doing something like that.
I love to do walks in the woods.
Absolutely. Nature is like the most healing thing. I mean, really, and most of us do not get enough time in at all, any kind of grounding you can do where you’re barefoot, and you can put your feet on the ground or in the water. Anything like that. is so so just grounding and settling to their nervous system. Yes. And it’s just I mean, that’s like force feeding, you know, it’s just you get negative ions. I mean, again, there’s so many scientific, like proof. There’s so much scientific proof that being in nature is really good for your system. That’s not like my specialty, but it’s there if people need it to really understand like, this isn’t just will. Nonsense. This is scientifically backed it is really good for you to be in nature, or
what are the other things I really like that you said is you said something about you’ll get yourself to take 10 minutes to sit down. And I know for myself, when I cuz I’m getting out
your phone. What? Without your phone?
Oh, yes, yeah. I thought you said my phone and I’m like, wait, wait, no, no, no. Um, one of the things I love is taken 20 minutes, and I’m gonna cheat and tell you that it’s an audio meditation. But because I’m creative all day long. I noticed sometimes I’m completely drained. And I can’t create to the level that I want to. I could keep working for more hours, but I’m not going to be happy with what I do. So I take that 20 minutes, I do the meditation. And then the next three and a half hours are so amazing that it fills my soul again, and it’s giving ourselves that permission to take the 10 minutes for you to take
I usually I usually meditate twice a day I’ll do in the morning. And then I will do it in the afternoon. And that’s like kind of instead of the, you know, two or 3pm Diet Coke that I used to have, you know, instead of because a meditation, they’ve done studies on this meditation is five times more restful than sleep, getting yourself into a state of meditation, that’s literally just, you can literally just sit down. I mean, I did this, when I, when I was waiting tables, back in the day, like, I would take my headphones, and on my break, I would eat and then I would put my headphones in, and I would meditate. And in a busy, crowded restaurant, you know, like, I used Insight Timer, I just had some white noise in there. Yeah, people would make fun of stuff. And I was like, no, because I knew there was no way I was gonna make it through, like the ending shift, without lowering my stress. So basically, you know, if you wake up, and you’re already in pain, which a lot of people are in within visibile illness, to meditate, you’re kind of lowering, you’re going down like this. So now you start your day, and you’re down here. And as you go through your day, you you know, maybe your pain increases. And as your stress increases, as you know, all these demands on you increase, if you can meditate some time before dinner, you know, then now suddenly, you’re dropped down. Yeah, and now you keep going, you go up, and up and up. And so now by the end of the day, you’re here instead of here. That’s a huge difference. Like, for me, I can get stuff done. If I’m here, I can’t if I’m here. Yes. And that’s, I mean, it’s, it’s just something that I’ve, I wouldn’t say I like, chose to incorporate this. It wasn’t like I grew up in this, like, I want to be meditating, you know, expert and meditate all the time, like it, sometimes it is tooth or nail, you know, once your mind gets going, you got your like, go and go and go and go and going. But the proof is just when I don’t do it, I noticed it dramatically. It’s kind of like, if you’re getting good sleep every night, which another that’s another thing that most people don’t get enough sleep up. But if you’re going go and go and and you’re getting good night’s sleep, and then suddenly there you have one night, no sleep, you feel that the next day, for sure. The meditation, all of these these practices that I that I do, and that I teach. A lot of people it’s not sexy, because they’re not overnight fixes. But they’re things that usually like you’re doing them in your life, and you’re asking yourself, just this is really working. But then if you stopped doing it, you realize oh, yeah.
When I go on vacation, because every time I go on vacation, I take it. And a lot of times it doesn’t come out of the car, and you get home and you’re like me what’s wrong? Yeah, totally. Absolutely. So tell us because I thoroughly enjoyed this conversation, and I know that my audience is really gonna want to find you. So where’s the best place they can find you. And then tell us about the new program you have come in I
got a cop, we will have something that’s place to find me is Emily shawls, calm, EMI, sh ou le s.com. You can also find me on Instagram at shift dot yourself. The easiest way is to find me. And my program, like I mentioned before, it’s called the canary club. And that’s just a group of women with invisible illness. And it’s a wonderful, just incubator, to learn to have support and to heal. And then my free retreat I do every two months. It’s called the shift yourself retreat. And it’s just a free online retreat every day for a week. And it’s just an hour a day and we go on we record in case you can’t make it live, but we just I teach I teach these concepts for free because I know there are a lot of people who will never, you know, hire me as a coach or or want to do go down that path. But I want to be able to serve as as many people as I can. And so it’s my gift to the community. And so, yeah, we’ve got one starting in a couple weeks, but we we I do them regularly. It’s my way of giving back and so that’s the the shift yourself retreat.
And they can find that on your website. Yes. Emily shelf calm. Yep. And you have Have a new one starting soon because we’re launching this episode next week so that people can get to it. So what’s the start date? When did they need to be ready?
November 8 is the is the next one.
Okay, so you guys go check it out. I’m super excited about you.
Thank you so much. I really appreciate it. Yeah.
Well, Emily, it’s been an amazing conversation. And I’m really excited about our bonus episode, we’re going to release where we’re going to talk a lot about Joe Dispenza. This one will be released, the bonus episode will be released two days after this episode. So I’m excited about having that conversation with you. And thank you so much for your time. And thanks for your vulnerability today to share your journey and your experience.
Thank you, Chris. I just really appreciate meeting you having this opportunity to be here today and meet all of your your viewers. Yeah, thanks
so much. Thank you Okay, I love that we were both like having these coughing fits at the same time. I was just like, oh my god, I’m not gonna make it.
It was like sympathy cough.
I see that now. Well, thank you so much. That was a really great conversation. And I really think that the listeners and I can always tell when the conversation gets really long. Because sometimes there’s just an ending, but with how well that went on. I really appreciate that you agree with it? Yeah. So you want to just jump into Joe cuz we’re on a roll. Oh, gallon? Yeah. Give it a second. Welcome to today’s bonus episode of granny journey, where we’re going to talk about Joe Dispenza, and the power of meditation. And I’m so excited that my guest Emily Shaw is here. Let’s start over because I checked on that. And then I called you Sean nacelles. It’s all good. Welcome to today’s bonus episode of granting journey, I’m super excited to have this conversation with my friend Emily, we did a full episode where we really talked about invisible illness. And now we’re going to talk about Joe Dispenza, and the power and science of meditation. So Emily, welcome back. Thanks so much for staying with me. Oh,
And so one of the things that really when I saw your information about doing a podcast as a guest, you mentioned Joe Dispenza. And I’m such a jettisons a junkie, that I just wanted to talk to you even if you didn’t ever become a guest because I wanted to make Dispenza. So normally the bonus episodes, we talk about either a healing modality or a book. And I think that this kind of incorporates both, because we’re talking about the science of meditation, and you have recently read one of Joe’s books.
Yes, his most recent one. It’s called Becoming supernatural.
And I have it that I have not read it, because science is a little deep for me to read. But I’ve done some of his videos, and I can follow along with that. So yeah, I want to put the disclaimer out to listeners, his books are deep, there’s a lot of science, I have to read the page four times, and I still have no idea what I’ve read. But I can watch his videos, and you can find them all over YouTube. And I can take those in. So I don’t want anybody to check one or the other out and be turned off. Because it is life changing capital letters period between each word.
Label, I think seriously, yeah, no, for me, um, I listened to it on audiobook, I tend to listen to nonfiction on audio books these days. Because then I can listen, when I’m in the car when I’m walking things like that. Fiction, I prefer to like, hold a book in my hand. Um, but for nonfiction, I like that. And I agree with you on the science. I mean, a lot of it is I mean, it’s definitely dense. But I also remind myself, no one’s going to be testing me on this. Like, I don’t have to repeat this back verbatim word for word. It’s more increasing my confidence in the material, so that I’m more motivated to do what he suggests that we do, which is meditate but not only meditate, he has a very like specific way of meditating and beliefs around that in order to create real lasting transformation. And you know, really upping your manifestation Mojo. Yeah. Well, yeah, if your science is not your thing, it’s okay. You’ll still and the book also has the entire first chapter is a testimonial it’s a, it’s a, just a story about a woman and her journey with it. So there’s definitely lots of stories and non hard science sprinkled throughout the book.
Well, and I bring the meditation, the science part because I have meditated for 25 years, I remember taking my first meditation class and I was in my, like, I took a class, I was in my early 20s. And there were two of us in the class, and trying to figure out how to do ohm and get it right. And, you know, so I never understood meditation. And I hear so many people say, Well, I tried to meditate and I can’t, I can’t quiet my mind, or I see black and I can’t visualize. And that’s okay. And some people need the science to keep them going. Kind of like when we talked about the main episode about knowing the science behind why vegetables are good for you, we’ll get you through eating them when you don’t like the flavor of them until you like the flavor of them. And, and so if you’re struggling with meditation, and you just want to give up on it, but you’re an intellectual kind of person, knowing the science is what will keep you going until you get to that breakthrough. Because if you meditate regularly, and regularly can be once a week, once a day, whatever your regular looks like, there is a breakthrough. There is that one day that you go, Oh my gosh, I just meditated. Like
for real? Exactly. Well, then. So there’s a reason why they call it a practice, like right, going to get it perfect. And even if you’ve had a string of really great meditations, you might have a couple that aren’t so great. Even if you’ve been doing it for 20 years like that, it’s fine. It’s, it is what it is. And what I always tell people is trying to read your mind of thought is like impossible. You know, there’s a great teacher named Emily Fletcher, and she has a program called Ziva meditation. And that’s what I had really focused on the floor, I discovered Joe’s work. And she says, trying to get your mind not to have thoughts is basically like trying to like have your heart not be hearing. Like it’s an involuntary thing, it’s what it does. So the goal of meditation is not to quiet your mind, the goal of your of your meditation is to one, increase the space between bots, and then also decrease the, the amount of time that you go down the rabbit hole with them. So a thoughts gonna come up, you know, but if you can just think of it as like, it’s a cloud passing, like, let it pass. And there are so many ways of, of, you know, doing that. It mean, they’re just infinite ways of meditating, you can have a mantra where like, you just have a word that you bring back, if you’re if you find yourself going down, or a thought rabbit hole, or like noise or the sound of your breath. I mean, there’s so many different things you can focus on. But it’s basically just picking something benign to focus on, that’s not going to cause you to go down a thought rabbit hole, and then just sitting and breathing. I mean, really, and it’s if we think about it, it’s like, what do we want, I mean, most adults all day every day, it’s like they just want to rest. We’re tired, we just want to rest. This is literally that. All you have to do is sit there, breathe, you’ll feel better afterwards. What I understand, it’s so hard to get ourselves to stop doing what we’re doing. Which is why I like meditating first thing in the morning, it kind of sets me off, but then also, you know, in the afternoon if I need if I need a little stress relief, it’s a great option. Once you once you get into it. It’s like you crave it. But in the beginning, it’s like lima beans sometimes, man, it’s not the most enjoyable
thing. Yes. Well tell us a couple of your favorite takeaways from the book.
Oh, I mean, one the testimonials for me are key. It’s what got me back into it. I had discovered Dr. Joe’s work several years ago, probably like five or six years ago, I think I did one of his online courses. But for me, he he records the meditations that he does that he you know, like will have on his website and stuff like that. And for me at the time, his voice was just a little I don’t know, I think the guys from Jersey, I mean, he just doesn’t have when you think of
meditative voice. Yeah, well, that’s
not him, you know, God bless him. But I understand like, I’m sure like a lot of his followers, they want his voice on you know, instead and so it kind of put me off, but then I I was shown a testimonial from him, my roommate showed me and it was this woman who had literally just like almost exactly the same symptoms as me. And she had completely healed from them completely, like, like, and it was just, oh, that got my attention. Like, you know what, I don’t care what this guy’s voice sounds like, I’m doing this, I want. And, you know, these are not overnight things. These are not things that you know, I mean, it could happen overnight. But a lot of his testimonials, it’s people you know, who are doing the meditations for consistently for a really long time, and that they spontaneous healings and things like that. But it’s not it. Like I said, it wasn’t overnight, there was a lot of stuff going on leading up to it. But once you really get into that space that he’s talking about, like the quantum field, and like being fully in like, within it, that you can just choose whatever reality you are, then suddenly your body heals. So it’s and the any of the testimonials, you can go on his website, or throughout their sprinkled throughout the book, these are people who were like, seriously messed up and are completely healed. And so it’s not just this one, like, token testimonial, there are hundreds, and it really gets you to start believing that, oh my god, if these people can do it. So can I like I’m not, I’m not different. I’m not special. Neither are these people. Like it’s just a skill to learn. And besides the healing, there’s so many other, you know, benefits. But for me, that’s what got my attention again.
Well, and to kind of touch base in case people haven’t listened to the full length episode we did. That episode we recorded this previously released is all about invisible illness. And so illness is very top of the heart for you. And for me, I do meditation because it does definitely work for my neurological system, and nerves and all that. And I don’t have what I would say is necessarily an illness other than the mind, monkey mind and not an illness.
Well, that’s just the human condition.
So I mean, for me, it’s just I start every morning. Most mornings, don’t force myself. But most of my mornings, I start with meditation, and I do a Dr. J meditation. And especially if I know I’ve got a hectic day full of calls are a big client project. I’m not getting out of bed, until I’ve done my meditation be absolutely Oh, and it’s kind of what you talked about in the main episode, I can start here and go all the way up, or I can start lower than here and anywhere to here and there by the end of the day. And so it’s not just for people who are struggling with something. But it’s also just inductor Joe is specifically love because it really helps you put yourself in that frame of mind. And I know so many of us wake up. And before he feet hit the floor, we’re already reading down our to do list. Absolutely. And that’s one of the things that Dr. Joe talks about. And one of the online things I listen to you and I’ve listened to so many of his stuff, I don’t know where it was, so I can’t tell you what it came from. But he talks about being no one nowhere, no thing and says if you’re getting in the shower, and you’re already thinking about making your coffee, you’re not in the shower, you’re already making your coffee even though you’re physically in the shower. And so that’s a great way for me to start my day of actually putting my feet on the ground. Yes, not already being in the closet of what am I going to wear before my feet hit the ground.
I think for me, the biggest aha that I’ve gotten from his work is that we are we become when we’re younger, you know, due to experiences, traumas, all of these things. We literally create a chemical balance in our brains. And we’re and then we literally become addicted to it because most people like you said they kind of live on autopilot. We live on repetition. We live on habits and so if it is your habit to be kind of ornery, and that is a habit, but it’s because you are used to how that feels in your brain and in your body. And so we literally have an addiction to a like a certain emotion. And so you could be doing all of these wonderful practices and self help things but like feeling like oh nothing in my life is really changing. I don’t feel that different. Over I do feel better and then like something That brings me back down here. And it’s literally because you wanted to be back down here. That was that was not knowingly, but that was the comfortable, normal feeling that you’re used to. And so if you start getting away from that your body and your brain are going to create scenarios that you get back to it, because that’s what feels normal to you. It’s kind of like being in an abusive relationship, it feels normal. So you stick around, even though it’s not healthy for you. So recognizing a state of mind as, as a potentially an addiction, really flip the switch for me? Yes, it gave me that motivation of how, okay, now, how do I change that? And for him, like you said, you know, it’s about getting out of the past, it’s about stop living in your habits, and start focusing on what is it that I really actually want to create? What is the who is the person I want to be? Okay, well, I need to start focusing on that, how does that person feel? How does that person live? How does that person walk through the world, and if you start practicing that on a daily basis, your your body and your brain, they can’t tell the difference? If it’s real or not, they just think that it’s, you know, whether it’s an in your head, your imagination of the future, or if it’s actually happening, they can’t distinguish. So it’s going to say, oh, okay, this is who we are now, well, I need to start making all of these chemicals in order to become this person. And so you can literally start feeling as you’re doing the in depth meditations, you can literally start feeling like neural pathways that have been connected, maybe for decades start to kind of like break apart, and now you’re not suddenly having all of the same habitual thoughts that you used to have. And now suddenly, you are more apt to like, start dreaming about your future than you are reliving the past. And that was, for me the, like, the most exciting part of his work. Yeah, it beyond just like the typical meditation that I had, that I was used to.
Yes, and I, I can say you said earlier about, people have done it long term. And then they have the healing. I joined a friend of mine, love Joe Dispenza, went to one of his retreats. And she did a challenge with some of her friends. We started in July and did a challenge through October. And that was July of 2020. Here we are October 2021. And I have been meditating to Joe, four to five, maybe seven, maybe three times for a year and a half. And it’s amazing. Because once you
once you start feeling the effects, like you pray that you want it, you don’t want to miss.
Yes, and there’s definitely that level of some days, I’m really good at it. And I go to a really great place, and I come out of it. And other times, I’m listening to a 30 minute one, and at 18 minutes, I come out of it, because it’s not where I want to be. But there’s that also giving yourself grace, to have to do it and not have to do it perfect.
Absolutely. But not doing it perfect is huge thing, especially, you know, with women with invisible illness, who I work with a lot, there’s usually a big old thing of like perfectionism in there that we have to unravel. So giving yourself a break. But also recognizing that self esteem, like the fastest way to build self esteem and self respect in yourself, is by doing the things that you say you’re going to do. Now, a lot of times we feel like, we want to just like throw away our to do list and, you know, run to the beach, or you know, do whatever. And sometimes like absolutely, like hold yourself to just like unrealistic standards. But a lot of times that’s kind of coming out of a very like adolescent mindset of like, I need to escape, I need to rebel, I need to do all of these things. Whereas research shows that if you stick to what you say, you’re going to do when you say you’re going to do it, that builds self esteem, because now your you can trust you. Mm hmm. So if I have determined that meditation is in my best interest, and it’s the best thing for, for me and my body, then when I do it, even if I have a crappy meditation, who cares? I did my meditation. That’s all that matters. Yeah. And that’s what I focus on. Like, just do it. It doesn’t have to be good.
Just do it. I love that trusting you
is, especially in the beginning, when you haven’t really started seeing the results. Like give yourself that’s why I like challenges like that are great. You know, give yourself 60 days and say, You know what, I’m going to do this every single day for 60 days and after that I don’t have to do it again in my entire lifetime if I don’t want I want to Yes, but just let me try it full out. So I can really know for myself, because words don’t teach only experienced teachers. I can sit here and talk until I’m blue in the face saying how great meditation has been until you actually practice it and do it and feel the benefits for yourself. You’re not like, who cares?
Yes, it’s just me talking. So do you have a favorite Dr. Joe meditation? Because I know there’s lots out there? Oh, yeah.
I mean, my favorites are the, he has several that are the blessing of the energy centers. That’s what it calls it. And it’s basically you. And this is part of, you know, there’s a big explanation goes into it, but basically, that a lot of us, you know, he has like the seven or eight energy centers, other people will call them chakras, whatever. But energy centers within the body and that if we are focused on these, like, a negative, fearful thoughts all the time, our energy stuck in these lower chakras, and you can’t get to being heart centered, being focused on serving others, creative ideas, all of these things, if you’re stuck in fear, and worry, and all of this stuff, which a lot of people are. And so by getting that energy flowing up, and getting your energy centers balanced, now, suddenly, you feel better in your body. But you also are more connected to the beautiful, wonderful feeling emotions in the world. Well, and
that one of the things I love about Dr. days, because I’ve got a couple of his energy centers, blessing ones, and I love he, when you purchase them, he gives you a 1020 30 minute explanation to listen to you before you start doing the meditation. So that you don’t just jump in and go, I have no idea what this is about.
Yeah, like, what is he talking about? Yeah, no, absolutely. Like he, he is a true scientist. I mean, Dr. Joe, he’s a doctor, he is going to give you the science along with kind of the woowoo. And for me, I always say that I’m just one Whoo. I can definitely roll in that world. But I also, you know, can definitely roll it in kind of the more like feet on the ground.
I love that I’m gonna
I for me, he embodies that really, really well, which I think is one of the reasons I resonate so much with his
work. Yeah. Well, I love him, too. And I am so grateful for a chance to talk about him with you today. Yeah, I really encourage
you to go to one of his workshops together.
Yes. I have a couple friends who are such Joe of meditation events. And I’m always like, one of these days. Oh, yes, days, but they sell out like 15 minutes. Yeah, yeah, you gotta be on it. Yeah, well, I have a friend who she got in and her husband didn’t. Oh, my God, and and he was like, I was sitting next to her entering the information. So it sells out that fast.
Well, and also, I will say one more thing. There’s a resource, a group of people who follow his work and are committed. And I’ve gotten to multiple workshops and things like that they have an organization called co heal International. felt just like it sounds Kokila International. And you can just Google them. But they are a group that will do free online, like remote healings for people. Whether or not you’re going through a chronic illness or more acute condition. You can sign up and you will get on a zoom and I’ve done it there. They’re usually they pick their six people, like he leaves that come on. And then they’re usually about 50 meditators all around the world. And he will meditate as you lay there and just accept the good energy, and it’s completely free. And so that’s a beautiful, beautiful resource for people.
Well, and we’ll put that in the show notes. So if anybody is driving and can’t catch it, go back to granny journey.com. And they’ll find this episode. And we’ll also have the links to find you. So how can people find you Emily?
They can find me through my website, Emily shawls.com. It’s EMI, sh a ules.com. Or you can find me on Instagram shift dot yourself.
Awesome. Well, thank you so much for your time and both of our episodes and it has been so much fun talking to you and I know that we will stay in touch.
Absolutely. Chris, thank you so much for having me.
Thank you Okay, so that was wonderful. Thank you so much for your time today. I thoroughly had fun with it. And I’m going to release it on Tuesday, and then I’ll have the bonus episode on Thursday. And it’s going to be kind of quick and last minute, but I’ll get you to probably be Wednesday before you get a chance to get everything. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely.
Oh, I’m glad I at least got to see a tail.
Yeah, well, you know, it was funny. That’s why I kept popping on mute is because they’d start barking and then a guy come running through the neighborhood. I’m like, oh, here we go.
Oh, no, here we go. Yeah, so that was that was so much fun. Seriously, like, anything I could do to help support God, as
well. And I would love to stay in touch. You know, let’s absolutely every once in a while. Just I’m on zoom just to chat and see how y’all Yeah, chat about me and that kind of stuff.
Not bad. Yeah. And if there’s any way I can ever support your mom, please. I wouldn’t. I would love that.
Yeah. Well, you know, one of my favorite parts of the podcast is just that I’ve met all these really amazing people. And I still stay in touch with them and communicate with them. And it’s like, part of college or something is that you share friends with people.
It’s the best part of this. Like, it’s great. Like this morning, I woke up and I was like, Oh, we got to talk to Christie. You know, like, it’s like, hell yeah. What else do I want to do with my time except I have deep conversations with cool people. That’s pretty much
it’s the best part of my job. And I’m like, Oh, honey, you need to work today. I’ve got a podcast. I’m recording. Well, thank you so much. And thank you so much for your grace about rescheduling. I felt like hectic trying to like Well, what about this time? What about that time so
me i I empathize.
Got it today. And I’ll I’ll be in touch next week with everything and then we’ll kind of go from there because I definitely want to keep up with you and stuff. Yeah. Okay. Absolutely. Have a wonderful day. Thanks so much. I