This is an unedited Transcript
Welcome to today’s episode of grounding journey where we’re going to dig all into the heart chakra and I’ve got my rose quartz here, I’ve rubbed some oils on me, I’ve got my water, and I am super excited to introduce you guys to my guest, Melanie wood. She has got a really neat story I can’t wait for her to share with you. She is an international communication and leadership speaker, Best Selling Author and founder owner of speaker speaking styles. It’s an organization that works with business owners, entrepreneurs, managers and leaders to step up and step out and leave speaking and communication. I know you guys are wondering if she’s all about speaking and why are we not talking about third chakra. But Melanie’s got a really neat heart story. And I think that the heart is such a it’s one of our centers. But it’s one of our brains too, because when we’re led by your heart, it makes such a difference. And Melanie has been on all sorts of media, Fox, NBC, CBS, the Boston Herald in New York headlined as a speaking coach for empowering women to have a voice in this world. So I know, Melanie, that this conversation about heart is going to empower so many people. So I’ve given your formal introduction. And I always love to hear who are you who do your friends know us?
Yeah, beautiful. Thank you so much, Chris. And I just want to say as well, I have my rose quartz as well. And I held it to my heart before we come on to just say I want you to just allow me to whatever message needs to come on today to come on as well when I had that. So I wanted to share that with you. And I love
that thank you.
And friends know me as I live at the beach here in Queensland, Australia. So people really know me as the beach person, because I’m always taking pictures was like go for my walk on the beach. They know me as someone that does yoga and meditation, so they know me as someone that is spiritual, but they also know me as someone that’s a fiery Sagittarian Scottish girl as well.
Great is hearing your accent, you know, I’m a North Carolina girl from the US. And, and that’s one of the things we’ll talk about is that you’re from Scotland, you are a fire redhead, and you live in Australia. So you’re just telling us who you are. And then I want to hear more about that story because that’s a neat story.
And, and they know me for having such a bit of like a dry humor. So from being from Scotland, we have a very dry banter, humor as well, which sometimes doesn’t always land in Australia. But anyway, I still give it a good go. So people know me as I suppose that fun loving Scots girl that is embracing her spiritual side, but also still embraces that the fire site is well. And and I think people just love to be as a part of that company because they can get different facets of me as well when I’m there that they know that I’m a listener, but I can also share some advice and suggestions. But I can also call them out as well, when they maybe see stuff. And I go really how’s that working for you?
I love that plan. So it’s so you know, you mentioned the fire and the heart. Like those are two. Well, first off, it’s solar plexus and heart. But those are two that, you know, are such a balance for each other. Because you want to have that compassion and that love. And you also want to have that fire and passion. So not just compassion, but passion. And it’s neat to find that balance. So you know, we talked before the episode. And so I know a little bit about you to be able to lead the conversation. And I want to hear and this is where you really came into your heart. And I love that you told me originally that it took you eight years to open your heart that when you moved from Scotland to Australia, you weren’t spiritual. And here you’re telling us how the spirituality leads you and guides you and how you are so connected to heart. And for if anybody’s watching it on YouTube, they can see you. But anybody who’s listening to the audio, you have this beautiful pink background behind you that looks like a giant Rose Quartz. So tell me a little bit about what brought you from Scotland to Australia, because heartache is always what opens our heart.
Yes, definitely. And, and I think as well, like it’s so much has led me to Australia but I didn’t really know what that was because again, as I said before, I’ve never been exposed to spirituality to self development and I was therapy and I had never been exposed to any of that while I was in Scotland. So then when I was exposed I do feel like there’s a reason to why I was exposed to it. But it was also the fact that yes, I have been through heartache. And I have been through a lot of challenges in my life that has led me up into where I am today. And really enshrined in Scotland particularly, it’s like no, two decades ago, I was in an abusive marriage. And, you know, the person that I was before that happened was definitely someone that was open to people to places to different things, even I didn’t really understand it. I always knew as a child, that there was something more to life, but I didn’t know what that was, because I didn’t understand it. But I knew that there was just something else out there for me and I disposal just let it go with whatever might happen. And, and in that marriage, and then leading afterwards, as opposed, like, I definitely shut down. And I shut down for like a good 12 years after it because I didn’t want to put myself in that position again. And as a female, I then started to think, Well, I never want to show weakness, I never want to show them the ability because to me, that’s you end up in that situation when you do that. So then afterwards, like I just, I just didn’t really do anything. But I remember in the marriage, I remember, I’m not religious in any way. But I did pray to God, just saying like, if you help me out of this situation, I’m going to work the rest of my days to helping other people like that was something the point that I got to rock bottom was, I’m no praying to God, because I don’t know what else to do. I want out of this relationship. But I don’t know how to do that. And I also don’t want to be in this world anymore. And then when I did leave, I literally just like I hated the world, it was so cynical, and I massively shut down everything, there. And then it was like 12 years later, I then had the opportunity to come to Australia. And my friend was going to come from like a holiday. And she said, Oh, do you want to come? I was like, Sure, why not? And then one thing led to another and then she said, Oh, do you want to come for the year was like, Oh, I’m in a really good job, I have my own home, I have a car, I really want to but I don’t know how I’m going to be able to do that and still have all these things to come back to. And then it must just have been something something happened and clicked for me was this is an opportunity to like, why don’t you just ask work? If you can take your career break? Why don’t you look at renting a site? Why don’t you look at you know, Can someone take your car and like, you know, I started to really think of those things. And these kind of messages were coming to me. And I asked work for career break. And they were like, like, as much as we don’t want you to go, Sure, why not. And then I led down to running out my house, my brother took my car. So all really kind of naturally flowed into all of these things happening. But it was really about six months prior to leaving, I was given the book, The Secret by Rhonda Byrne. And if anybody has read it, come across it if you haven’t, I would definitely highly recommend it. And I remember reading only a little bit of it. And I got to Joe Vitale. And he said in there was I’m going to be a little bit in your face and say that everything that’s happened in your life up until now, you have attracted. And I remember having the book going, I didn’t ask for that marriage. I didn’t ask for all of these things. Like I don’t believe that. And I remember shutting the book. And I threw it back at my friend because I thought, a little bit of Bs, and then she gave it back to me and she said, can you read it again with an open mind. And again, as probably quite a fiery person. I always like to, you know, prove other people wrong that I’m going to. I’m still I’m going to do it. So I read it again. I probably skipped by Joe Vitale. I laugh at him now when I do listen to every now and again. I do I go Yeah, Joe. I mean, you’ve got like a little thing going on here. You know, I can live about it.
And I finished the book. And then I watched the film and something something inside clicked. And I went there’s something in this like I’ve been given like a second chance at life to come to Australia. And I just started to consume so much self development books started to really look into spirituality more started when I came to Australia and people would just come into my life to teach me certain things. So I think definitely I would say it would be 10 years ago that I really started to to look at life very, very differently. And that was probably the calling to then start to open my heart because that was obviously great. it’d be a bigger picture and a bigger pathway to where I was where I was meant to go in that time.
Mm hmm. Well, I think that we are all, you know, you see it in every meme that you can find, well not mean, but spiritual, quote, inspirational quote, that we’re all being called to open our heart. And I don’t think now more than other times, we’re just more aware of it. Now, that that is one of, to me, one of our biggest life purposes, is to come into this world, because as a baby, you come in full, open hearted because you don’t know any better. And time shuts it down. And then it’s our journey to open it. And so a couple things that you talked about that I would love to elaborate more just in general conversation, is you said, you had this wonderful opportunity to go to Australia for a year and your immediate response was, but I have a job, a house, a car. And I think we all when it’s time, like the capital T, capital I capital M, capital E, when it’s time, we’re given these amazing opportunities and doors, and they may not be as exotic as Oh, I can move to Australia, it may be something as simple as I can join a new church, or I can join a new circle or you know, we don’t maybe necessarily see the amazement in it at that moment. But we’re given these amazing opportunities. And then we come up with all these excuses, of why we can’t do it, have we? We’re tired. We’re too busy. That’s too far away. There’s too much fear. That kind of stuff comes up for us. And so one, I congratulate you on saying, Well, let me see what I can do about that. And I challenge our listeners to see what you can do about that. But I’m sure in some of the work that you’ve done, and teaching people to speak, we all face that fear. And we let it stop us. I am so perfect at doing that with grounding journey. And every time I’m feeling fear, I just kind of back off and then they go no way fears my compass. If I’m just feeling it in my heart as butterflies that’s calling me to do it. Yeah. So talk for me for a second how you talk about not letting that fear block you how keeping your heart open, moving forward now, because obviously now you’re at an open heart place. And you don’t let fear, at least not stop you for a long. How does that picture? And me, you know, we all got to let it stop us for a minute to realize this fear. But how has that shifted from 10 years ago when you said, and don’t think I can do it too? Now you letting that lead you?
It’s definitely like, No, I take the time to come into my heart like I’ve got a decision. I’ve got something to do. Yes, in that moment, I can allow my head and different things to come over me. And then I go no, wait a minute, when it just pause, come back to the breathing, but come back to my heart. And I definitely do and my rose quartz as well. I put my hand on my heart. And I say like, what would you have me do? What would you have me see today. So I definitely do come back to that. And I’m a lot quicker now than what I used to be. You do get to stop yourself and go, no, that’s just your inner chatter. That’s the ego, like, let’s just really come back to your heart with how you want to then speak to someone how you want to act and how you want to do things. And again, I’m human like everybody else, it’s not always there, I do have my moments where fire comes in. It’s just not as fiery as it used to be. And I still then kind of remind myself, Oh, come back to the heart. So I do a lot of heart coherence as well. So I’m certified in them, the HeartMath Institute, because it’s something that I help help my clients with. But it’s something that I definitely needed into the next chapter where I wanted to go. So I always come back to getting to good because the heart has the the really has the biggest brain is the way that I see it because your heart actually talks to your brain more than the other way around. So if I’m having moments of maybe overwhelm or anxiety or something like that, I’m a lot quicker now at going, I need to come back and connect myself again, because I’ve maybe left my body because of whatever might be going on, I’ve maybe been triggered. So I always come back to that breathing technique to again, just make myself feel safe again, in my own body and come back to that but it’s something that I definitely work with people on now to help them expand their heart to then speak from the heart as well. A really, you know, come back to the heart into that which is really my biggest passion.
I love being able to talk about different ways because I think it helps people go, Oh, I can try that. I can try this. And so coming back to your heart and that visualization of putting your hand on your heart and breathing for a minute, and we’ll talk a little bit more about Heart Math in a few moments. But I know for me, one of the things that I’ve noticed is, I’m so self conscious about my shoulders, keeping them back, because I sit at a desk all day, just like most of all of us. And so trying to keep my shoulders back. And knowing that that opens my heart. And that’s one of those things from yoga is back bends and opening because we round forward. So one of the ways for me that I’ve started to notice that I’m off, is I’ll feel my shoulders coming in. And to me that feel, that’s how my energy contracts. And so just, you know, if coming back to your heart, or some of these things feel overwhelming, because it’s new to you, and you’re new to learning. That’s just a simple, open your shoulders, push your shoulders back, open your chest, so that your heart is open. And for me, that really helps me go. Okay, that’s what I need. That’s what I want.
Yes, yeah, definitely.
And I think that’s kind of a fun. Body sense. I like to feel let my body be my compass and my director. You know, just getting curious. And when you feel that fear of, why am I saying no? Am I saying no, because it’s safe. And I don’t want to explore more? Am I saying no, because it’s fear. Definitely getting that radically curious about
the fear of,
is it legit, because I’m going to fall off the side of the mountain? I shouldn’t do this? Or is it just because, you know, so really asking those questions of yourself? Do you ask yourself questions or kind of where does that go for you?
Yeah, I definitely get curious and not to go like what’s, what’s the what’s going on? is like, it’s not me. But what is that something that appears to go? Is that me? Or is actually that someone else? Because again, we’re very and we’re energy, we’re energy, we are energies, we’re connected to people. But it also can be as someone could be thinking about, you’re talking about, like, there’s certain things that then can come back. And so I always asked myself of, Is this mine or someone else’s? Yes, it’s easier to then if it’s like, okay, it’s me, okay. I’m going to go and do some sort of technique. If it’s someone else, it’s like, well, I’m going to hand that back to someone because that’s not mine to deal with, as well. But definitely, with the with the fear. I do get curious to what is that? Like? Is that something now? Is that something that I’ve maybe been triggered by from something else that’s maybe happened? And then sometimes I do write it, I do write it down, or I connect, I connect with my guides and just say like, I really like this resolve? Could you show me the right way to be able to do it, if I just feel that I’ve done all my techniques, and sometimes they don’t all they don’t always work because it’s just not in that maybe something a bit deeper, you’re like, I’ve exhausted at all, I’ve meditated yoga, I’ve done my heart, they’re good. Like it’s still not happening. So that it supposes that part of surrendering to Yes, I’m going to hand that overnight because I feel like I’ve just controlled everything for the last hour or something like that. So I suppose part of that heart thing as well is like in the fear is like the control and the trust to then hand it over.
I think that’s a beautiful point that you bring up is surrender, because that’s so much of hard work is surrendering to it. And just when we surrender, we stopped trying to control it. We stopped trying to lead it. And you know, as you said, when you’re not getting the answer why? Because sometimes what we think is the best thing isn’t in fact the best thing and isn’t. And it may sometimes be that we have to go somewhere really sucky first. Yeah, to find the beauty and it so sometimes it’s just not time yet. So thank you for bringing up surrender. I would not have thought to say that but it is such a part of the heart work. I did a whole podcast episode on surrender. And I will tell you that one of my girlfriends has listened to all of my episodes and still says that her favorite episode is a surrender episode. Yes, that’s a great point that you bring up.
Yeah, it is and it’s something that I work on because I’m again, having what happened to me in the past is like I still want that control because I feel like if I keep the control of all the things that are happening then I feel like I’m safe. And I always have to remind myself of let go and then I have a little bit of fun about it as well like getting I’m curious. And I kind of say, I say, Oh God, sorry, again, I was doing your work for you there this week. So I’m going to give it back to you. Because I don’t know who I am that thinks that I can do it better than you. So having a bit of humor myself as well to not be so hard on myself to things that I’ve done, and I just have a little bit of a laugh around it, and then surrender it back and say, I think this is yours. It’s not mine.
Oh, my gosh, I love that. You said, sorry. God was doing your work again, for you this week. I wrote that down. I’m gonna have to put that on my bulletin board in front of me, because I definitely. Yeah, that was good. I thank you. Thank you for telling me that one. That won’t be quite on my Instagram about this episode for sure. So let’s talk for a second to about the secret about what we attract. Because I haven’t been through the trauma that you’ve been through. So it’s easy for me to look back at my life and say, Oh, I can totally see where I attracted that sucky part of my life. I see where I attracted that bad experience. But it’s because I haven’t been through your level of trauma, I’ve been through my level of trauma. And I think and one of the things to say when we’re talking about trauma is whether it’s been your intensity of trauma of an abusive marriage, or my level of intensity of family illnesses and things, we all should give credit to the fact that whatever our trauma was, it was our trauma. And maybe there’s just different levels, because you had something different to experience than I had. So let’s talk about how you have worked through, assuming you have the the thought of we attract our experiences, hmm.
And I think like over the years, like after reading the secret, I then have then went into more into that energy. I’ve also again, had coaches, I put energy healers, like and I continue to, to have those people in my life. And really, I went down that path to understand it more. So like I started with people with kinesiology and, and because it at the beginning stages, I didn’t understand when I was in my body. And when I wasn’t, I didn’t understand it. And when I went to get energy healing, like they’d spend the majority of the session bringing me back into my body, because it was just like, I don’t want to be here, this is all a little bit too hard, particularly in the beginning stages where it was quite confronting to suddenly have an outburst of all of these emotions that I had kept suppressed for so so long. So to deal with that was quite scary at the beginning. But I think as well, like I now start to go, when things do come into my life, I go, and maybe it’s still because again, we all still have some key parts that come into our life. But I’m, I’m more aware of it of going, well, you know, you kind of still had that energy going. And I think I’m understanding more about, we can have the thoughts and we can think think think think think I want, I want I want. And over the years I’ve been learning, it’s more about the feeling. It’s more like, am I connecting with the thought that I’m having, but am I actually feeling it? Am I feeling joy? Am I feeling happiness? Am I really in love with all of those things happening? So I really then understood the energy of if I’m not getting things that I really want, I then come back and go, Well, it’s not matching up to the thought to the feeling, you’re then maybe coming back to like your heart, you’re maybe certain things you’re closing off to your heart again. So let’s come back and open that again. So that you can energetically bring the good stuff in when that’s not happening. That’s not happening as well. So I think the energy wise as I’ve got a lot more understanding and clarity around what that energy is, and then the day then still look at it and go, we can never avoid challenges. We can never, we can never avoid certain people coming into your life and challenging us. It’s just the next part of the growth and involvement as well. But yeah, just really, I suppose I set myself up for the day better than I ever used to be. So the energy wises, make sure they’re my meditation, I’m doing my yoga, I’m doing the things that set me up in an energetic way. Because I don’t know about anybody else and maybe yourself for people listening. My brain is like the minute the alarm goes off. It’s like I’m going to hit you with 100 miles an hour of everything that’s wrong in your life, right when the alarm goes off. So I then really need to like get out of bed and go straight into meditation and some things I can have a lot of fights with myself, a mayor. All this stuff is coming in and then afterwards I’m like, what was that? Like? What was that like? What changed or what happened, but it’s just in that moment, sometimes we don’t always, we don’t always win when the meditation winner sells over, sometimes it’s just well, we have to go through that because we just needed to in that moment, so definitely energy now is like making sure that I take a break. Like if I feel myself coming back into energy, I don’t like coming back into the thoughts I don’t like, then I just take a pause and come back and come back to my heart again and go, you’re not connected, something’s not right there, you’re going back into ego, you’re going back into that energy that doesn’t actually serve you. So I really change it wrong, too. Big thing that I do now is, if energies around if I don’t feel that kind of getting the things that I want, or things are not happening as fast as I would want them to be, I come back to the word humility. So that’s my word of like, then come back to the heart. So it’s like, what’s Melanie’s plan in this world, but Melanie’s plan is different to the divine plan. So let’s come back to the heart. And if we come back to the hearts being service, it’s being of humility is something that I’m here in this lifetime to definitely learn is humility. So I think that’s why then how I then change my energy to then knowing that what I’m putting out there is what I’m going to then get back as well.
That’s a great word. I’m, I totally am a girl of words, and not necessarily a word of the year, sometimes it’s three. Sometimes that’s a word of the quarter. And that is a beautiful word to have, especially as you’re doing this work and as you’re processing through this journey is to keep that humility, because we do all get so guided by ego. And even if we’re trying not to be guided by ego, sometimes, we’re not even aware. That’s what’s leading us. So I think that’s a great word. And so you talked about how you do meditation, I believe that you have mentioned, do you do yoga use crystals, obviously, you’ve done some Reiki. And I think those are all such amazing ways to support our chakras. It’s more of a way to quiet and a way to calm. And I appreciate that you said sometimes even when that meditation, my husband’s just starting to meditate, and he says that some days, it’s not good. And it’s having that grace with yourself that it, it doesn’t have to be great. It doesn’t have to be magical every time. It just have to be that you keep coming back. And you keep returning I we were traveling for most of December. And so my first day back on my yoga mat, my mother in law was here, my two dogs hadn’t seen me in three weeks. My two cats, I have a 10 week old, or 10 month old kitten who was thrilled at me back, my son was here, his girlfriend was here, my husband was here. And it was the first day I had my yoga chakra cards. And so I was so excited, I was gonna go practice and I laid him out and it did my practice. And my mother in law came in twice and my cat, it’s lit them across the floor. And I like on my mat, like this is the best practice ever. Yeah, it was that. Accepting that this is my environment, accepting that it’s my moment. And loving it genuinely. Yeah. And so I don’t really know what that has to do. But I just wanted to share that it doesn’t have to be perfect. It doesn’t have to be this great music playing my candles, my incense, you know, it was just, I was on my mat. And I was doing it. And I was happy to be there. So saying that about your meditation and practice.
It is it’s so important because you have people can then set themselves up to think it’s got to be perfect. Or when you have a really good meditation, like even some things I can go and go like, I want it to be the same as I had it last week, because that was amazing. And you really got to get it’s coming back to control and you’re like, but I want it to be like that, because I really connected. I really was like in a whole other world. And I say again, this was comes back to this surrender. And those actually more challenging moments in meditation or yoga is actually where you probably learn more as well because you’re adapted to European then kind of put in a position to go. This is my leg. It’s a little bit chaotic. There’s a lot of stuff going on. But you know, I’m just gonna go on and do my yoga anyway. is the same with meditation. It’s like I can maybe have neighbors and kids are crying or whatever is happening and you know, around it. And you know, in the past I would have been like, well, that’s really annoying because it’s like, it’s my time I get up early so that that doesn’t happen. When it does happen then I just think well, you just embrace it because it’s real life. You can still tap into yourself to other things. It’s real. We’re in the 3d like you’re kind of not going to get it with it.
Well, let’s talk for a second while we’re talking about tools, let’s talk about heart math because I was introduced to Heart Math, two ish years ago, maybe three, through doing Joe Dispenza. Meditation. And so I’ve got the Heart Math months old schools that plugs into my phone and attaches to my ear. It’s not Bluetooth. And, you know, I, I’m glad you brought it up, because I haven’t pulled it out in at least a year. And so I made a note to myself. But let’s talk about that for a second. Why don’t you give us a little introduction to what HeartMath is?
Yeah, and I just want to say as well, it was through Joe Dispenza, that I ended up doing it. So in 2020, when everything happened, I do to Spencer would have been here in Australia that year, and I would have went to his week long retreat, but that’s okay. So I ended up doing his online progressive, yes, workshop and buying that and then using it, and then it led to then me going to the Heart Math and thought, well, actually, people, you know, my clients, people in the world are actually going to need this more than ever. So why not develop it, learn it and body and then use it. And the thing I was coming back to when I share this is that when I started it, it was not it was not a good thing process for me, it was actually really quite hard to to come back into that. That type of breathing that type of again, more into my heart it was my body was just like, What are you doing, like what is happening here. And then I did have some people where as I was going along doing the certification, I was practicing on people. And people were just like, This is amazing. My life’s changing, all of this is happening. And whereas for me, I was like, this is awful. Like, I hate you. This is really awful for me. And everybody’s like, I feel like I’m a better parent. So you know, with my kids, I’d like everybody was really, really enjoying it. But then I think maybe I was just being too hard on myself. But I was just every time I went to do it, my body was just like, No, like we’re not doing this, I found it really hard in the beginning. So I think again, I had to surrender to just it doesn’t have to doesn’t have to be a win every single time. You’re just going to the next next level of your heart to open it even more and connect with it more. So yeah, I did that. And again, over time in that year, I then was to be able to develop it for myself, but I was able to enjoy it and be okay and feel safe. But I think I realized that by doing that it was starting to trigger my safety, it was really triggering so much entirely of like my vagus nerve system that was already in terms of trauma, like it was already so effective that I didn’t know just how much I had been affected. And so it was just going to that next level of being able to trust myself to know that I was safe and to be able to come inside to do that. So it was definitely opening for me to open my heart more and connect with myself. But then being able to help other people. So I did it in a way of wanting to help people with the speaking because I’ve been researching like I wanted to get like her real time to to teach people to be able to overcome that fear and other things that I had was things that you couldn’t really do in person. It was things you do before. But I wanted something that people could do sitting here and no nobody would even know that you were doing it. So I believe that that was what led me to it. But then in doing it, I realized that it was more than just that. But it was actually about a whole your whole life. It was not just about this speaking and so being able to help people to come back to their heart as well to do that. But it really helped it did help me and it did help and it still continues to help help people when I do teach it to people to do as well. So going through that process of the of the program. And then you said a test at the end as well. I think my heart was definitely going like oh my God, I feel like I’m sitting a test I feel like I’m back at school it’s making me really nervous. So you’re like I need to use the tools but I think going through the processes that I started to understand the body to the mind to like a lot more inner stuff that I kind of knew from Dr. Joe Dispenza. I’ve followed him for quite a long time I have a coach that uses certain aspects of his as well. But I think it gave me a deeper understanding when I did the program to understand myself more to then then use that to then help other people. So I think using that tool was a really around embodying something more deeper than what I had done before for myself, but how I could then help other people but it’s definitely I opened my heart more and develop that trust, it’s probably you know, it’s still been like two years ago, it’s still been a process. Because again, we’ve all been dealing with so much in the world that’s been happening. It’s still something I do, I do come back to, but I don’t necessarily need to go and listen to the audio is like I can No, do it for myself, and then teach other people how to do it as well.
Well, and I think that so much of breath work, is opening that heart and releasing segmentation. And you get the same thing from yoga, because you’re moving the body, but through breath work, because I can do yoga, I can move stuff around my body, I can pop it out. But you let me do breath work. And there’s the fear, the discomfort, like I don’t know what the different level, I don’t know why, at least for me, it’s such a different level of No, not going there not ready to do that, because it definitely stirs up something. And again, how to guests, we did a podcast earlier in 2021, where we did breathwork loved her totally drawn her attention or her energy. She lives less than three hours away from me, I did that episode, I was like, Man, I’m going to do breath work with her, I wanted to do breath work, I’m going to do it with her, Well, if literally almost a year to the day of recording with her and have not reached out. So there is that level of at least as I said, for me, and it sounds like for you, it stirs up something different.
Yeah, it does. It’s there’s definitely a level of discomfort. Like for me, I think as well as you know, your bodies and your mind are so used to the emotions that you’ve had for so many years. So it’s like, then you’re going to something that’s completely unknown and foreign. That’s that kind of, it’s bridging the gap from going I’m okay to feel this. Because again, we kind of come back to the feeling of the past, and then the emotion because we’re comfortable with it as much as it might be horrible and really discomfort, we know it. Whereas over here, it’s like I’ve never felt my heart open like that, or I’ve never felt like really ease and peace. Like there’s always been this knot in my stomach. So I feel like I’m more safe than that than I am over here. And, you know, in some some days, I mean, I still have to, I think as well like, the more that you can do it and not leave it so late to do it. Then again, you’re connecting and rewiring your mind and body to know that it is safe to do that. But I suppose not I just I really attempt to not leave it too long. Like if I’ve had something happen, I’ve been triggered. If I don’t deal with it pretty quick after it, it will escalate and I and I it will be harder for me to come back. And then I probably would need a healer to help me do that. Yeah, cuz I’m out of my body and I’m gone.
Yes. And that’s one of the things that you know, it circles back to the beginning of the conversation is so much hard work is coming back to your body, being present, even in the discomfort, surrendering to the discomfort because it’s going to be way easier to go through it, then to stay on the side of it. And you know, having a 20 year old son, we have that conversation often have. But isn’t it just easier to work through this now, then stand here and looking at it. Because in six months, you’re still going to be standing here looking at it if you don’t go through it. So it’s definitely that coming back in your body and being present and surrender.
Well, you have had some amazing insight for me today. And I’m sure that our listeners are going to feel the same way. The notes that I’ve written down trying so hard to be present, but like Oh, I got to remember to go back and look at 20 minutes and 13 seconds. So Melanie, thank you so much for this conversation about heart thank you so much for your vulnerability about sharing your experience and I feel very strongly that my listeners are going to want to find you so how can they connect with you? Where do you hang out these days?
Um, so I hang out on Facebook and Instagram so on dirt Melanie, which are speaking styles, you can you can find me on those two platforms as well and my website is speaking sales.com.au So you can go there and you can find all the social media links there for everything as well for it.
Great and we will definitely put that on the podcast link if you go to grounding journey podcast.com To see this episode, we’ll put some links to HeartMath to all that you I’ll even link the breathwork in the surrender podcast so that people can really dig a little bit deeper into this. And I’m excited about our bonus episode because we’ve got a new book that I have had on my bookshelf for a long time and have not gotten through. And it’s by Jan Spiller, astrology for the soul. And I have two of Dan’s pillars books actually think I have three but the other ones just on the shelf. And the other one is New Moon Astrology. So if you are interested in astrology, the soul, the nodes, the new moons, we’re gonna have a fun conversation about that on the bonus episode that were released two days after this. So invite people to check that episode out to check you out on Instagram, Facebook and your website. And again, Melanie, thank you so much for the conversation. Thank you for opening your heart and sharing with us today.
Thank you so much for having me, Chris.
Thank you for coming back to listen to our bonus episode, we talked in the main episode about the heart chakra with my guest, Melanie wood. And you know Melanie, one of the things I did not acknowledge in the full recording was you’re in Australia. I’m in North Carolina. It’s five o’clock in the evening to me, what time is it in the morning to you?
It’s 820 The next day, so I’m on Friday? Yeah, so
I was thinking it was drastically really early on that we have been on for a little while. So you you got on at eight o’clock. So that’s not so bad. But I’m glad you’re here. I am glad that we’re gonna keep talking. We are going to talk about Jan Spiller, astrology for the soul. And so I have read a little bit of it. It was completely interesting, intriguing and overwhelming, because I will say that it is a book that is 520 some pages. It’s definitely not a book that you have to read cover to cover like an Elizabeth Gilbert novel or something. But because I’ve read a little bit you’ve read the whole thing, you’re totally immersed in enjoying it. I’m going to turn the mic over to you. Tell us what you love about astrology for the soul and where what attracted you to it.
So it was actually my I have a mystic A mentor, and I work with her and she just happened to share it with me didn’t really go into much about it. But just so you don’t get the get the book. And I did mine, and I got it, and going into more into astrology and understanding my natal chart more. So when I read it Slimer my sun sign is Sagittarius, and my moon and north node is in cancer. So complete polar opposites once fire ones water. So when I read when I read my chapter in cancer, because that’s what I’m here in this lifetime to learn. So in in being a Sagittarian is really comfortable, because I know how to do it, because I’ve done it in many past lives. Whereas in cancer is completely foreign. So it’s then going from fire to water. And when I did read it, like I actually got really upset, because it really kind of like hit home for me of who I am, who I’m actually here to be. But the tears were no of like sadness, it was tears of I know, fully understand myself now. Like I used to think, wow, like I have been that person, but I didn’t understand why. So when I read it, like her really understood more about myself, which I think again, knowledge is power. But then I also read the tendencies I need to leave to the tendencies I need to develop and thought, wow, that’s going to be quite a challenge. Because it’s very opposite. And it goes back to those emotions, those emotions that I don’t really know how to deal with because it’s not, it’s not comfortable for me. And so you know, reading it, then what I have done is like I start to just read little sections each day. And then that’s maybe my intention for the day. So we spoke about in the episode that I talked about humility. So humility is one of my areas to develop. And so I always that’s like my focal part on it. But the more that I started to understand it, and then I then link it to my life, I link it to my business, and then remind myself of what am I here to do, like, and I start looking at it as well as I write water, I live at the beach, who skin see the ocean just outside, and I come back and go water is my superpower. It’s like water, when we think about it, water is really disruptive. It’s really powerful. Like you can’t fight with water. If you’re in it, you’ve just got to go with it. Right, right. So yeah, it’s been really, really interesting. And it’s something that I definitely work on, particularly my, my, my chapter in my north node that I’m doing. And I always come back to the affirmations in there as well that I have. So think things are wrong, because it’s all to do with me sharing my feelings. And again, thinking of what has happened to me in the past, again, these are things that are really foreign for me. So like it says, like, when I share my feelings, I win. So it’s like no, and there’s little phrases throughout the book that I know use to then validate someone else’s feelings rather than me going into like, okay, they’re in a really dark place. Like, I know how to fix them, like I know what to do, right? That’s, that’s comfortable. For me, I’m like, Well, if that’s happening, go and do ABC and you’ll be fine. But in that moment, they just want to be heard. And they just want to be validated enough feelings bit for me, that’s, that’s really weird. And I don’t want to sit there like I’m better now than I was. But it’s really foreign for me. So now it’s like I just it’s like a little bit more each time, someone maybe comes to me with something that’s happened or they’re a bit emotional, like I just I go in and maybe a couple of minutes more like and I keep doing more and more of that to be okay in that moment. So I do use some of the lines that are in there that help with communication, because I’m here communicating that I’m a teacher and a student as well. I’m out of it. But since I did my chapter, I know, I know go through it with clients, and I find out what their North note is. And we were and we work through that related to communication and speaking as well. And people are like, wow, I know understand myself better. And I can then help them more in depth around what could be holding them back from speaking from the heart speaking with authenticity as well.
Well, and it’s such a neat book because it does help you understand a little bit of your purpose and so to kind of share. What I love about Dan spiller is I think astrology is really cool. I think New Moon and full moon energy is really cool. But I don’t know enough about it and there’s so much out there but it’s not, it doesn’t resonate for me to spend all of my energy learning about it. It’s not my modality. But it’s a neat tool to understand. So what I love about Jan spiller is that she, she wrote this book for me, she wrote this book so that I could figure it out without feeling overwhelmed. So at the beginning of the book, she has all of the birth dates and dates, so that you can figure out, you know, you don’t have to get your chart read, you don’t have to have an astrologer figure it out. You can see based on the year you were born in the sign you were born under what your note is. And then when you go to the section, she’s got the attributes to develop in this life, the tendency is to leave behind traps to avoid, she talks about what you really want talents, professions, personality, past lives, dissolution of ego, humility, your word, diffusion versus focus, confusion versus counseling, vagueness versus detail, past life fears versus the here and now, self doubt and anxiety versus faith in action. I’m just reading a couple of the subtitles so people can really understand what’s in the book, sever or suffer lifetime giving versus being drained, translating love into service, and then your needs. So self confidence, building confidence through worldly experience, outward focus. And it just goes on to the order romantic relationships, regular relationships, attractions, practical strategies, your goals in life. And you know, you think, how can somebody write a book without knowing me and know what my purpose is in life purpose. And that’s one of the things about astrology, that I think I discovered doing astrology versus Akashic records, astrology, there is some commonality there is a community to our signs and our energies. I don’t know why. I don’t know how my girlfriend who is a Leo and 20 years older than I share so much of the commonalities, but we do. But then you look at your Akashic records, and that’s the individual you, that’s where it really defines you. But, you know, my friend who is 20 years older than me, and like five days, we are so similar. And she recommended the book to me. And it really is you read it, and you’re, you know, you kind of want to throw it across the room, because you’re like, Whoa, it’s a little too intense. And especially because Jan wrote the book, Jan, like, we’re good buddies. You read it in 1997. So it’s been around for a while, my copy is beat up and bruised, because I bought it used bookstore. But it’s neat. And then, as you mentioned, talking about healing other people. You’re like, oh, let me read about my husband, and then you gotta pay to fix you, honey, here’s how. And that doesn’t really work very well. I know.
Exactly. And it Yeah, because I had a client who been right through her kids and her husband and just, you know, figuring I just go to the wall. And I really understand my kids better and things like that. And I thought, again, it’s it’s the power, we understand it what we do with it is completely up to us. But it’s just it’s understanding. And it’s just helping us through the days of when things maybe don’t happen or do happen. And again, it’s that energy wise of, of things. But it’s like, again, it’s it’s a great tool, but it’s then you still hunched over because you surrender, it’s like, I understand that this is what I’m here to do. But I don’t have all the answers on how to do it. So I’m just going to hand it over. So it’s like, I read little bits of it, I then have set an intention for the day out of it. But then it’s like I hand it over and say like, show me opportunities for me to develop this side, because I can’t fully do that one on my own, as well.
Well, and I think that’s a great way to say it is it gives you understanding. And there definitely points in your life that when things are rough that you’re like, why, what is the purpose of this? And then you can refer to that and just, Oh, okay. But I will say where you said it gives your client understanding of her family, just like I don’t research my child’s illnesses on Google anymore. Unless you’re really really good at not fixing people. Don’t research your family’s astrology because you’ll try so until you you know that you won’t
die. Exactly. And it’s and as I say, like people that I go through with it’s like we don’t it’s just certain areas then I can know how to help people. But I say like you don’t have to buy the boat. You don’t have to do it. I give them their tendencies to develop and not and take The picture and send it and say like, I will help you as we work together with certain parts of this. But apart from that, it’s you’re just having the understanding, you don’t have to do anything around it.
Well, and it’s a little different because they’ve hired you to actually fix themselves. So you are being retained to give them feedback where my husband has not retained me. So it’s definitely finding that balance of it’s unsolicited don’t give unsolicited direction. Exactly. Funny. Well, I think that astrology for the soul is an amazing book. I hope that people will find it interesting. But while we’re talking about Jan Spiller, just because I introduced you to this book today, I want to throw this one in there for the mix. So when you’re searching through, you’ll know any Jan spiller book is really neat. So this one is New Moon Astrology, and it also talks about the nodes. This one was written actually in 2001. So it was written after her big one, and it’s not as big. But what I love about this is, it gives you again, it gives you a calendar, not based on your birthday, not based on your astrology, but based on the moons and what sign they’re in and what year and so this book goes all the way to I think 2015. So you got it covered. Like it’s a wise investment. And it tells you, you know, January it’s the Moon in Capricorn. And so what it helps you do if you’re into new moon intentions, but don’t know astrology and don’t know what it is, and don’t want to just look on Instagram to see what everybody’s telling you. You’re supposed to be doing. It breaks it into, like the New Moon in Taurus, you want to manifest money, sensual pleasure or contentment present per servant, perseverance, patience, self worth releasing stubbornness. So it kind of tells you what is ideal to set your intentions. Of course, any new moon, you can set any intentions that are powerful you at that moment, but it kind of directs you into in that sign. What intentions are going to be really powerful. It even has one I was reading about when to set the intention of moving or a new house. And that doesn’t mean that Oh, it’s 10 months away. I can’t set that intention. But it just shares with you when that’s most powerful of that new mood and that time.
That’s pretty cool. That’s good. That’s very Yeah,
it’s a neat book. And it even gives you like sample intentions to set up different sentences and stuff. And I never use those exact sentences, but it kind of gives you support in thinking of what you’re trying to do. So, Jan’s filler is a great one I won learn astrology and new moon, highly recommend her. And we know what I really loved when I have the questionnaire to invite people to be a guest. I always asked what are your three favorite spiritual books or interesting books you’ve read? And your answers were astrology for the soul, the secret and How To Kill a Mockingbird. And I thought that was a very wide range. And uh, you know, maybe the secret in astrology for the soul isn’t that far apart, but the How To Kill a Mockingbird caught me off guard. So I had to visit that for just a second. And I know we’ve covered lots of books in this episode. But I’ve just had so much fun chatting with you in the full length and, and really enjoying the conversation. So I want to just hear and a short synopsis. Why is How To Kill a Mockingbird on your top three.
Because it’s really about you, we all have a power, we all have a power to hurt or hate or love people. So if you’ve ever read or watched the film, it’s like he has the power. He doesn’t actually use it. So we all have the power to Yeah, to hurt people or to love them. It’s like you you decide which one you want to use and whether you actually really need to do it. So that’s the that’s the kind of Morris was the underlying story of that book, or what’s happened there?
I’m so glad I asked you the question then. Because in North Carolina, How To Kill a Mockingbird is required reading in like seventh grade. Yeah. So I read it, maybe read the cliffnotes maybe read a couple chapters. I don’t even remember I just know it was maybe it was eighth or ninth grade. But it was early on when I would not have gotten that. And then we had to watch the movie as they’re now that that really did pique me of okay, I’ll go back and check it out. So I’m glad I asked. Yeah, and we do talk about the secret and the full episode. So if people have not listened to the full episode, where we dig into the heart chakra and they just found this episode first. The episode before this one is where we talk about the heart chakra. We talk about the secret and we talk all about your journey to open the heart. And so thank you again. Melanie, so much for being here with me today for taking the time to have this conversation. And you know, you’re in a whole different day than us. So it’s really neat because you’re in Australia and you’re like in the future. But thank you so much for being here. And I know that our guests are gonna want to find you. So where are you hanging out? Where can people find you?
Yep, so Facebook and Instagram speaking sells, Melanie would or you can go over to my website speaking sales.com.au. And you can find me from there.
Well, thank you so much. And we’ll have all the links to you on granny journey podcast.com. So if people are driving and don’t get a chance to write it down, they can just go check it out, and they’ll find all your information. Thank you again, so much, Melanie, for the conversation, for the enlightenment and for the stories. Thanks for being here.
Well, thank you so much, Chris. Thanks for having me.